Post # 1
Anyone else inviting some extended family, but not all? Or is that like, EXTREMELY bad etiquette? I really need to trim my guest list further and I’m just not that close (do not particularly like) some of my family. So i’ve been debating this issue for a while, and even though everyone says “it’s your wedding, invite who you want” i’m wondering if its even worth the family fued and what i would say if i had family ask why “so and so” didn’t get the invite.
what do i do?
Post # 3
How extended? We invited all first cousins, aunt and uncles. But then both my husband and I only invited select members of our more distant family (great aunts, 2nd cousins) based on whether we saw them often or had a close relationship. If it really is extended family I think its totally fine to only invite some of them.
Post # 4
we haven’t really started to make our guest list yet but both us decided that those who will be invited are those “who care enough to send christmas cards every year”!
basically, we are only inviting close family and friends. no other extended family and we aren’t afraid of any potential problems. you’re right. it’s your wedding, invite who you want!
Post # 5
that’s the hard part. they are all aunts and uncles and none of us are really that close but we do see eachother at least twice a year.
@purquez, i like the holiday card theory!
Post # 6
I invited all first cousins, and then 2nd cousins that I see on a regular basis, one’s that I havent seen since childhood/in a while didn’t make the list. Maybe have them on a “B-List” ?
Post # 7
We invited aunts and uncles.. but when it came to cousins we were selective. I.e inviting all from my mothers side because its smaller, and none from my fathers side.. because we dont really know them that well and my fathers side will just think that the cousins invited are friends of ours and not actually cousins AND any of my cousins from my fathers side, will just think its only aunt and uncles invited and wont be offended.
Tricky management involved and I dont need to worry about FHs family, because he doesnt talk to many anyway and his mum and dad havent been involved in wedding talk anyway and their not contributing to the wedding, so they get no say!
I think you should move people you dont really want to a B list. I dont think they will be offended. People understand these days I think.
Post # 8
I have a huge family so I only invited two of my aunts and their family b/c I am closest to them….the other 14 couples did not get an invite. I’ll send them a wedding pic/announcement later.
Fiance is close to his extended family and our wedding will be near his family (far from mine, conveniently) so we’re inviting his 3 aunts/uncle couples but no cousins (we won’t fit in the venue).
Post # 9
I think if you are closer to some of your family and not others then you should invite the ones you want. If you aren’t really close with any of them, I would exclude the whole group.