(Closed) Invite etiquette… Actual name or used name?

posted 6 years ago in Etiquette
Post # 3
10453 posts
Sugar Beekeeper
  • Wedding: February 2014

I’d go Bob. That’s what he wants to be called, and a lot of silly etiquette formalities seem useless to me. 

Post # 4
7901 posts
Bumble Beekeeper
  • Wedding: March 2012 - Pelican Grand Beach Resort

If your invitations are formal, you should use Robert. If, however, your invitations are informal or you know he hates the name Robert (instead of just preferring his nickname), then you can use Bob.

(Keep in mind, the number one rule of etqiuette is not to offend, so if addressing him as Robert would offend him, don’t do it, but if it won’t offend, the formality is generally considered pleasing and nice and an acknowledgement of how seriously you take the act of including this person in your event.)

Post # 5
8041 posts
Bumble Beekeeper
  • Wedding: December 2013

@ccmoff:  I would do “Bob”. If you used “Robert”, it would sound pretentious IMO. It’s not like this is a legal document or something. It’s a summon to a hopefully fun wedding lol.

Post # 6
9548 posts
Buzzing Beekeeper
  • Wedding: August 2013

Bob! Unless i’s a very formal invitation.

Post # 7
3267 posts
Sugar bee

It is always most polite to go by the name a person prefers to be  called. 


Post # 8
39 posts
  • Wedding: April 2013

I agree with the pp(s). Always use the name the person identifies with. he uses Bob for reason

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