(Closed) “Invite these people”

posted 9 years ago in Etiquette
Post # 3
330 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: December 2008

Wow. That’s pretty forward (and rude, IMHO) of her to just email you like that and tell you to invite people to the wedding that you and your Fiance are paying for. How does your Fiance feel about it? Maybe you should talk to her about it? Since you’re paying, you have a say on who gets invited. I’m sorry for that added stress on you! I hope you’re able to work it out!

Post # 4
5822 posts
Bee Keeper

That would SO not fly with me.  The reply might go something like:

We are willing to invite these people:

Short list of people we’ve actually met or would like to meet.


We’re paying for our wedding ourselves, so something like this just wouldn’t fly.

Post # 5
672 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: November 2009

Yikes.  Do you know most of them?  I’d call her up and let her know (even tho I"m sure she’s aware) you’re on a budget and she has to trim her list.  Or that you just really want to keep your list to people you’re both close to.  Don’t cave on it especially if you’re paying — it’ll just make you miserable.  I hope you get it worked out!

Post # 6
1379 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: January 2010

Stay out of it if possible!  Tell your fiance to deal with it. And make sure you and him are 100% on the same page!

UGH, I’m sorry that’s terrible!

Post # 7
400 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: May 2009

I agree with the others- take her list as suggestions, trim it to those you know, and if she gets mad, tell her that YOU’RE paying and can’t afford to invite everyone!

Post # 9
596 posts
Busy bee

Let him write back and say "This won’t do.  Please call me to discuss." 😛

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