(Closed) Invite to destination wedding but not to at home reception

posted 11 years ago in Etiquette
Post # 3
2640 posts
Sugar bee

How many people are we talking?  Who?  Is it mostly just your friends?  If so, I’d say jsut invite them and not the "wedding" people.  If the destinaition wedding people are very small in number, I’d say maybe just invite them. 

Also, how formal/informal is the 2nd reception?  I get the impression that being at home, it will be more relaxed, if that is the case, I wouldn’t feel all that obligated to invite the wedding people.  If you do invite them, I would be sure to let them know that you do not expect them to bring a gift.

Post # 4
752 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: October 2016

It seems that anyone who is close enough to you to be invited to the destination wedding should also be welcome at the home-town event, if they’re in/from the area where your second event will be held. I think that it would be awkward to ask someone to travel with you somewhere, then basically tell them that they’re not welcome at an "after party" celebrating the first wedding.

I’d say that you should be more selective and deliberate with both of your guest lists to avoid hurting feelings of those who love you. Perhaps your destination wedding could be just close family and closest friends, then the at home event could be a more laid back event with friends and family friends. Then your family could help you put on your second event if they’re willing, rather than being seen as additional guests you have to entertain. 🙂

I hope that helps! Good luck!

Post # 5
160 posts
Blushing bee

I agree with driftslikesmoke. Im sure those who are willing to make the trip are close enough to you that you would want them at your reception anyways…right?? Maybe you should reconsider having "just anyone" attend your wedding in the first place. If they are not close enough to be celebrate with you at an at -home reception, why would you want them at one of the most private times in your life (your CEREMONY!)

Post # 6
1718 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: June 2008 - Winery in the Gold Country

I would think that an invitation to one doesn’t mean that you have to invite them to the other. How many people (outside of family and bridal party) are you intending to "overlap" invitations with?  I’d think that if you keep the "double invites" to family and VERY close personal friends, then you should be fine to invite the rest of your guests to only one or the other.

Post # 8
7052 posts
Busy Beekeeper
  • Wedding: July 2010

If we indeed choose the destination wedding (meaning outside of metro Atlanta area), we will have a separate tapas/cocktail party for our friends here at home. 

We realize money is tight now for many, alot of people have lost jobs as of late, and not all could afford to travel with us to a destination wedding. 

Family and lifelong friends at the destination wedding.  All local people and work friends and colleagues invited to cocktail party/reception where we’d show the wedding on video!

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