Post # 1
This evening, I was literally five minutes away from ordering my invitations. I asked my Fiance if he thought his parents would be offended if their names weren’t on them, figuring he would say no, but wanted to ask just to be safe. Well, of course he said yes, if my parents are on there, his need to be too. (He wasn’t aware of the tradition that whoever is hosting gets top billing on the invite.)
The original layout has John Smith and Jane Doe (my parents are divorced) invite you to the wedding of their daughter…………….
The design of the invite does not allow for Sue Smith, daughter of (bride’s parents), and Steve Jones (groom’s parents), especially because they are all divorced and both of his are remarried, giving us four parental “units.” (I swear I’m not 12! )
My Fiance and I and my parents are paying for the wedding. His parents are not contributing monetarily, but I’m sure they will be helping with other things, i.e. decorating. They also offered to do the food themselves, but Fiance politely declined and hired a caterer instead.
I also want to add that the old fashioned gal in me would like to stick to the traditional wording. I’m also afraid that if my dad’s name isn’t on the invite, people may not recognize my name.
Now, I’m looking for more generic wording options that don’t mention any parents. Our invite layout doesn’t really allow for “together with their parents.”
So, these are my questions… Am I wrong to only want to include my parents on the invite? Does anyone have any good ideas for wording that does NOT include parents’ names? (Hint: the invite has room for three lines of text then BRIDE’S NAME to GROOM’s NAME.)
Post # 3
Go to verseit.com; they have a ton of verses you can choose from.
Post # 4
Does it give you an option to put in a line after the grooms name?
son of John and Mary Smith
Post # 5
I included both sets of parents although some are not contributing at all and some help a lot (my parents are also divorced, mom doesnt have $ so she can’t help and dad gave a lot, FH parents gave some $ and helping a lot with purchases) I listed everyone’s names 🙂
Post # 6
Etiquette usually says that whoever pays, gets their name on the invite. And more traditionally, since the Bride’s family usually takes care of the wedding, it’s their parents names.
I did a search on the knot’s invite feature and came up with some of these:
Ms. Heather Marie Smith
Mr. Michael Francis Jacobson
together with their parents
Mr. and Mrs. John L. Smith &
Mr. and Mrs. Mark Franklin Jacobson
request the pleasure of your company
Or you could do like:
The parents of __Bride_ & _Groom_ request the pleasure of your company… etc
Post # 7
ours said my name his name and third line “together with their parents” basically acknowleding everyone
Post # 8
Dr. and Mrs. Bride’s Parents (married)
request the honor of your presence
at the marriage of their daughter
son of Mr. Grooms Dad
and Mrs. Grooms Mom (divorced)
This makes it so that the bride’s parents are doing the inviting- and thus indicating their monetary involvement. But it also reconginzes the groom’s parents.
Post # 9
I’m not against adding “son of….” after groom’s name, but it doesn’t fit on the invite. I tried it this morning and it looked like a total afterthought.
Post # 10
I know you said you don’t want to word it “together with their parents” but, i think that is the best way so no one gets offended although they are not contributing money to your wedding they should still have a place on the invitation. After all they are the people who birthed and raised your fiance into the wonderful man you are going to be marrying. I felt the same way about my invitations beacuse my parents are practically paying for the whole wedding and his parents aren’t paying a penny towards wedding costs. But, in the end i know they are not financially in the position to help but, still deserve some recognition.
Post # 11
Good point, roxy. I just don’t want my parents to feel like they’re not getting the recognition they deserve for their contribution.
Are there any alternatives to “together with their parents?” Also, my invite layout does not allow for our names to be at the top.
Post # 12
Yep, we did “son of…” in order to honor his parents. I hate to say it, but if it’s so important to your Fiance to have his parents’ names, would you consider tweaking the invite layout?
I’m not suggesting to start all over, I’m just suggesting that maybe the importance of the mention of his parents merits a re-evaluation of the layout.
Post # 13
I would gladly tweak the layout if I could. We’re ordering them from Vistaprint, so I can only make so many mods that fit their format.
Fiance said he thought all parents were supposed to be on the invite, but later admitted he doesn’t really care either way. But his response has really got me thinking about whether his parents will be offended.
Post # 14
@CountryBee11: Hard to say since you know them better than we do. Because they’re not contributing financially, etiquette says it’s okay for them not to be included. So I guess it’s just a matter of how you think they will receive it. Sorry that’s not helpful!
Post # 15
No prob, Gemstone, I appreciate your input! I’m just not really sure what to do.
I played around with adding “son of…..” again and it’s not so bad, except I can’t fit all their names on one line without using microscopic font. (Two Mr. and Mrs. parentsofthegroom.)