(Closed) Invited way more than the venue holds. Help! What do I do?

posted 5 years ago in Venue
Post # 3
Member
642 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: February 2013

Did you send out that many invitations

Post # 4
Member
947 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: November 2012

Are you paying for it? If so, then you shouldn’t have allowed your mom and Future Mother-In-Law invite so many people.  What is the max amount your venue can hold?

Post # 5
Member
3121 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: June 2012

@eriniscruzin:  Pray!

 

JK…sort of.  Unfortunately, you need to stop Fiance and his mom.  They had their chance at their list.  

Post # 6
Member
1902 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: July 2012

That’s the trouble with those “Oh, great aunt Effie won’t come, but invite her anyway” invitations! We’ve had a lot of them, too, and the family from the other side of the country are all excited to come, even though we thought they wouldn’t!

Luckily we’re having a very cheap wedding, so any extra people are only around $10-20/head, but it’s still stressful.

Is there any way you can change your options with the venue? So, rather than a sit-down meal, you just serve hors d’eouvres? Are there any people that you would feel comfortable uninviting?

Post # 7
Member
4803 posts
Honey bee
  • Wedding: September 2011

His family adding on an extra 30 people or so wouldn’t put you from 125 to 287…even adding on your 60ish out of town guests  doesn’t add up to an extra 162 guests! I know PPs have said you need to stop your Fiance and hismom, but honestly I disagree…I can see why theyd’d be a bit hurt that a crazy high percentage of the guest list is your family friends. Sounds like they had 20 of the original 162 and now hae a bit over 50 out of 287 guests? So I’d say YOUR part of the guest list is the problem here. This is why it’s NEVER a good idea to invite more people than you can afford and just assume the OOTers won’t come…have you already sent out invites? How many of your RSVPs have you gotten back/how many people have said yes? Over 150 extra guests is crazy!

Post # 8
Member
3121 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: June 2012

@Wonderstruck:  Oh I TOTALLY agree that having an imbalanced guest list is no good!  That should have already been addressed. However for the sake of solving the problem (assuming the invites are already out since she has responses) don’t you think that’s the only solution, aside from UNinviting people?

Post # 9
Member
9917 posts
Buzzing Beekeeper
  • Wedding: June 2013

Did you already send invitations?  

Post # 10
Member
4803 posts
Honey bee
  • Wedding: September 2011

@Mars62312:  You’re right, inviting more people is definitely a bad idea – once the invites have already gone out that should be it. I guess it just kind of rubbed me the wrong way that OP sounded like FI’s family is the problem when clearly 90% of the increase was done by her/her family. But they’re still going to have WAY too many people – it’s just such a huge jump in the guest list, I don’t really know how to fix that if invites have already been sent, other than changing to less expensive options for the food and such like @LadyElva: suggested. But if the venue is over capacity…geez, I don’t know what I’d suggest then.

Post # 11
Member
3121 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: June 2012

@Wonderstruck:  Damn.  Didn’t think about the numbers in the OP.  FI only had 20 out of 125?  Ouch.

Post # 12
Member
3039 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: August 2013

Is there anything you can do to change the venues seating arrangements so that you can accommodate more guests? 

 

Also, if all these people are expected – any way you can just ask for money as your wedding gift? You might offend some by not having a registry, but in this situation, you might want to just take that in order to pay off some of the costs.

 

And as said previously, consider cutting costs wherever you can. If you had planned to have an open bar, bring it down to just beer and wine. Anything that’s not contracted yet, DIY! With all those family members, you should at least be able to get a helping hand!

Post # 13
Member
4803 posts
Honey bee
  • Wedding: September 2011

@Mars62312:  Yeah, and now 50 out of 287…I know you said you have a huge family,  OP, but that’s really unbalanced and I think cutting from his list should really be a last resort. Although I guess it’s time for the last resort if you have over 150 more guests than you planned on.

Post # 15
Member
6015 posts
Bee Keeper
  • Wedding: March 2012

wow .. Cut the kdis, seirously … get a baby sitter or something. Maybe if you tell the Out of Town people kids aren’t allowed they won’t want to come.

You are so over on your numbers tho … I’m sure FI’s family is treating this as a vacation.  What if you talked to the venue … good luck

Post # 16
Member
3687 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: August 2013

Your original post said you invited more than the venue holds — how many people can it hold? That may be your biggest problem. I honestly don’t even know how it’s possible to invite 162 *extra* people when your original limit was only 125.

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