Post # 1
Our wedding is in the summer. 8 months away, in fact. But our invitations are here and ready.
We have a small issue though – our venue capacity is fixed. We cannot go 1 guest over the capacity. Not 1! And it’s tight.
So, we basically need to send out our invitations in batches. Family first, then close friends…you get the idea. Who we can give invitations to will be determined by our RSVPs.
So we were thinking of this plan:
First batch goes out mid-January; 6 weeks to RSVP
Second batch goes out 2 weeks after the RSVP deadline for the first batch…; 6 weeks to RSVP
Repeat until guest list is filled!
A couple of points..
1. All of our guests will have to travel for at least 2 hours to get to our venue and therefore will have to stay overnight – so there won’t be any “spur of the moment” changes.
2. Personally I think more notice is better, but is 6 months too much?!
3. In our culture, there are no +1 invites. Each invited guest will be individually named on the invitation itself.
Post # 3
@Spideykiss: Is the RSVP date printed on the invitations? Will those in later batches find out they were in a later batch?
Personally, I would only send out one batch to those you can accomodate. If that means you can’t invite friends then don’t invite friends or find a larger venue.
Post # 4
It is a bad idea.
#1 SO much can change between now and then, changes in work, finances, availability of babysitters etc., make any replies you get now a best guess, and cannot be used to actually invite other people.
#2. It supposes that your event is THE most important event to extended family and friends that they would be willing to decline every other invite between now and the actual date. Even if that meant missing lunch with the Queen, or meeting their idol, because they had already RSVP’d to you, months out of time.
#3 Dealing with 3 different RSVP dates, managing the follow up, sounds awful to me.
#4 People are bound to find out there are differing dates and invites, which could cause hurt feelings. Guests should never think they were anything but your first choice.
Post # 5
@andielovesj: This. If you sent me an invit in January with a 6 week RSVP for an August wedding, I would have no clue how to respond accurately. I would go with ONE batch of invites in May/June, and then fill in from the list who didn’t make it on the first cut if you need to.
Post # 6
- Wedding: July 2012 - Catholic Church
@Spideykiss: I think this is a decent idea, but that you should start the process closer to the wedding. We did something similar where we got more nos that we thought we would and ended up sending out another batch with the RSVP 2 weeks before the wedding (make it earlier than that so they have time). I’d say 3-4 months out is a good time to start the batches. Since all your guests have to travel at least 2 hours, did you send Save the Dates? If you didn’t, then I think it may actually be a good idea to send the invites sooner rather than later.
Post # 7
@asscherlover: The RSVP date will be written on invitations. The “batches” are not people who know each other – we met at college so our families and friends live in very diverse locations! Plus, his family live away from where he grew up (and therefore his friends from his hometown don’t know his family) and ditto for mine. So it’s unlikely that anyone between “batches” would interact. And do we care if they do? I mean, we’re trying to get as many of the people we love to come as we can – we just have a finite capacity 🙂
Post # 8
@andielovesj: Interesting reply. Personally for me, there’s not much in the world that would come between me and a family or friend’s wedding but I do see your point.
Post # 9
@ScottishMrs: We are not sending Save the Dates – we have told everyone we would definitely invite the date already. The majority are family. We don’t use Save The Dates where I live; have never seen one. Had never heard of them until I came on weddingbee!
Post # 10
- Wedding: July 2012 - Catholic Church
@Spideykiss: That’s the same reason we didn’t use them. Just plain old never heard of them and no one would understand them at all around here!
Post # 11
I honestly think January is too early. I think you could maybe send them out late April/May 1 at the earliest (or 3-4 months before your wedding). Maybe put the RSVP date in mid-June. Then send out the others after that.
Or you could use the same RSVP date for all, and send some out early in May (to group 1) and once you start getting some No’s back go ahead and send out the corresponding invites for the second group. But this depends on how prompt people are….