(Closed) Invites Mr. & Mrs. so n so & FAMILY????? help please.

posted 8 years ago in Etiquette
Post # 3
1940 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: July 2010

I think different families view weddings differently.  I know that some of my family views weddings as completely family events.  All the little ones should be invited, special coloring tables, etc.  


My Fiance and I basically agree that the reception isn’t for “us” exactly, it’s really for our families.  Having said that, we are only inviting guests aged 13 and older.  It’s really a choice you have to make together.  I would be cautious about inviting some kids but not others.  That may cause more hurts feeling over not inviting any kids.

Post # 4
1580 posts
Bumble bee

I think you just need to sit down together and make the guest list. You can’t exceed the number of people that can fit in the venue or the number of people you can afford. Maybe the numbers will help him. But in the end, you need to both be happy with the guest list.

If you don’t want to put “and family” you can list the specific family members who are invited on the inner envelope.

Post # 5
1154 posts
Bumble bee

I think that’s an important coversation to have. 

Maybe approach it that way, say, honey I hadn’t realized this before but I think you and I view weddings as very different affairs.  There are many many ways of viewing and having wedding, and many different “goals” or “points” of wedding.  Tell me about how you view it?  Let me tell you about how I see it, I see it as a party that a couple throw to celebrate their commitment and invites their families to share but the families are not the point of this celebration and if the couple are throwing an elegant evening party it is not an apropriate place for kids since the presence of kids won’t be desired by the couple.  Now, that we know how each of us feel lets talk about the kind of wedding we want to have and the point of this wedding we are throwing.  Let’s try to come to an agreement and possibly a compromise.

Post # 6
5823 posts
Bee Keeper

What do you mean that you were on the same page with “certain kids?”  That you would be intentionally excluding or including certain kids?  Honestly you have to have an across the board rule.  You can’t choose to invite some children and not others…

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