Post # 1
Member
241 posts
Helper bee
Hi Bees!
My uncle has been in a relationship with a woman for quite some time now. They have a child together, and my uncle has a child from a previous relationship. They are of course invited to the wedding. The problem is the the girlfriend has 3 children from a previous relationship. I’ve only met 1 briefly, and even then it was more of a I noticed him with my uncle’s ‘entourage’.
My uncle has been like a dad to me. He has to be at my wedding. However, I don’t want his girlfriend’s kids there. Is that wrong of me? Should I invite them?
Post # 3
Member
5110 posts
Bee Keeper
I think if you are going to have some of their family,and some of their kids there then you needto invite them all. You cant invite half of their family. Either that or dont invite any of the kids.
Post # 4
Member
3314 posts
Sugar bee
I think you should invite them. Think of it as if you were one of those children and you watched your mom and step-dad and 2 of your step siblings going off to an event that you were invited to. I’d be crushed and those kids don’t deserve that even if they aren’t related to you!
Post # 5
Member
167 posts
Blushing bee
If you invite any of your uncle’s kids, you have to invite them all.
Post # 6
Member
46336 posts
Honey Beekeeper
Of course you have to invite them. It would be cruel to invite only the two children.
Post # 7
Member
4371 posts
Honey bee
Like PP have said, you have to invite all the kids. You say your uncle is very close to you. I’m sure he would be offended if you only invite 2 out of 5 of “his” kids.
Post # 8
Member
726 posts
Busy bee
All the kids or none of them. If other guests are allowed to have their kids, though, they may feel slighted. Unless you have some age cutoff like only kids over 13, and all their kids are under 13.
Post # 9
Member
726 posts
Busy bee
…sorry… :-(. i only hit submit once i swear!
Post # 10
Member
2192 posts
Buzzing bee
Cinderella being left at home while the stepsisters went to the ball? I am sure your uncle is working hard to not show favoritism to any of the children so why create drama with your wedding? All or nothing.
Post # 11
Member
241 posts
Helper bee
From what I gather the kids are holy terrors and they don’t come to any other family events. They aren’t small children either.
Post # 12
Member
4824 posts
Honey bee
Do they all live together 50% of the time or more?
If yes, then they all get an invite.
If no, you can get away without an invite.
Post # 13
Member
241 posts
Helper bee
@lefeymw:Honestly I’m not sure. Whenever I see my uncle it’s just his son and daughter. Her kids never even get mentioned.
Post # 14
Member
1843 posts
Buzzing bee
What are the ages of all the children? I think you have to invite all or none … and if the step-kids aren’t around much, they probably won’t attend.
Post # 15
Member
352 posts
Helper bee
I don’t think it’s wrong of you, but you can’t exclude someone’s children but then allow some other person’s 5 kids. You certainly can’t allow JUST the child that is both biologically theirs and exclude the 3 previous. It’s just not right.
Post # 16
Member
34 posts
Newbee
My vote is in for the “none or all.” But I think it depends on how old they are though: if they’re older the ones that know you might go and the other ones will just stay behind.
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