(Closed) Inviting coworker's boyfriend

posted 4 years ago in Guests
Post # 2
5996 posts
Bee Keeper
  • Wedding: January 2017

Yes, you should. No question. If you didn’t feel like ‘B’ is a true friend then you shouldn’t have invited her to begin with. But what’s done,  is done and since ‘A’ gets to bring her bf,  ‘B’ should too.

Post # 3
355 posts
Helper bee

You can’t be mad at her for putting you in this situation when you’re the one that created the situation. Not inviting her serious boyfriend was rude. She’s asked for clarification, you can either 1. Stick to your guns and let her know that hes not invited and further the rudeness of your initial snub or 2. Extend the invite to her boyfriend that should have been invited in the first place

Post # 4
486 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: September 2017

You don’t have to invite him (or anyone you don’t want to) if your friend/co worker decided to decline on that basis then that’s that.


I seriously abhor the idea that you should be inviting perfect strangers to your wedding because they are in a relationship with someone you would like to be there.  ‘Social units’ exist outside of romantic relationships and most adults should be able to manage in a social situation where they might not be together for a few hours.


You have numbers and you have a budget and this is your wedding it isn’t for anyone else (other than your FI) to decide who gets to come.

Post # 5
6940 posts
Busy Beekeeper
  • Wedding: April 2016

View original reply
sibarita :  So you want to do a rude thing, but don’t want to be seen as rude?

Post # 6
6798 posts
Busy Beekeeper

I see this a little differently because it is a coworker group that you have invited. They should all be just fine as a group.  The mistake was including a boyfriend when no one else got one, but you’ve already crossed that bridge.  

Are you saying you are over capacity for your venue, or just for your budget?  If it’s the first, tell her you are sorry but there isn’t space and you’ll be glad to have him if the opportunity presents itself.  After all, there is literally nothing you can do about that. If it’s the latter, find some extra money lying around to cover him, since you were inconsistent in your invites and it backfired.

Post # 7
526 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: June 2017

I see no reason why you should have to invite her boyfriend.

You’ve invited a group of co-workers, so it’s not like she is going to be alone, there is no reason to invite him just to be her accessory. Tell her you’re really sorry, but you’re over capacity as it is and can’t accommodate any more guests.

It’s your wedding, invite who you please.

Post # 8
2 posts

I don’t think you were wrong not to invite the boyfriend, and “B” should not be asking to invite someone who was not on the invitation.  However, now that “B” has asked permission, I don’t think you can say no without looking rude.

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