(Closed) Inviting families with babies?

posted 8 years ago in Etiquette
Post # 3
1161 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: March 2011

Ask them.  At one, the parents may prefer that the kiddos have actual chairs, or they may want them in their laps or in high chairs.  Each kiddo is a little different, so definitely ask.  And DO NOT count them in the food count…and make sure you caterer doesn’t either.

Post # 4
269 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: September 2011

We are also having an afternoon wedding which will include babies/toddlers.  I think you should have four seats reserved on the invites and then just make a note to yourself to only include two “eaters” for the caterer.


Plus, putting four on the invite is a great way to let your friends know that you are accepting of their infants.  Many couples planning a wedding don’t really want (let alone encourage) people to bring their children along. 

Post # 5
1927 posts
Buzzing bee

I would think they would probably want high chairs.  A one year old is too small to sit in a regular sized chair without constand assistance from their parents.  But they are too squirmy to sit in a car seat or your lap for a meal.  I would definitely ask them though.  Honestly… with one year old twins, they will probably want to higher a sitter and have a day to themselves!

Post # 7
2496 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: January 1991

I second the PP’s that you definitely don’t need to include them in your food/seat count, unless their parents want them to have an extra chair/space for a high chair.

We have 2 babies (FI’s cousin and my college roommate’s baby) and we’re just giving them extra room at their tables for high chairs and such.  On my RSVP cards, I only wrote the adults names, but I had already talked to them and they knew they could bring the babies!

Post # 8
4582 posts
Honey bee
  • Wedding: October 2011

I’ve been wondering how to handle this situation, myself. Many of our friends are already married and starting families so there will be several couples with babies ranging from about 4 months – 20 months at the time of our wedding. I don’t really want to invite the babies specifically and to be completely honest I’d prefer to not have them there at all (I love babies, I just don’t want them crying during my ceremony). So I’m figuring I’ll just invite the parents, and if they ask, I’ll tell them they can bring along the little ones (if they absolutely must). I wonder if it’s rude to tell them I prefer that they find a sitter?

Post # 10
6572 posts
Bee Keeper
  • Wedding: February 2010

We put babies names on the invites. I thought it would be less confusing for the parents if we just flat out said they were invited. We didn’t include them in the food count, and we asked the venue to put high chairs instead of seats at their table.

Post # 11
4137 posts
Honey bee
  • Wedding: May 2011

we’re doing the same thing as @artbee:

Post # 12
459 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: April 2010

I invited one family with a baby, and I put the baby’s name on the invite. Saying “Joe and Emily Jones and Family” would also be acceptable. Either you are inviting the baby or not, and it’s best to make that clear on the invite. If you don’t put the babies’ names on your invite and one family brings their baby anyway but another doesn’t because they thought the baby was not invited, feelings will be hurt.

My venue was very clear that they would not charge for a baby, but that they would include a highchair or chair if necessary. As your venue/caterer what their deal is, and ask your invited guests with babies what they prefer in terms of seating or whatever else they might need. I assumed my venue wouldn’t be baby-friendly, but they actually even had a pack-n-play available if it was needed!

Post # 13
132 posts
Blushing bee
  • Wedding: May 2011

We put the names of the children on the RSVP cards because we wrote each persons name on the card.  Ours were for my 13 year old cousin but I would have done the same thing for a baby.  That way they know you are specially allowing the babies to come, otherwise some people might be confused as to if they can bring other guests or just the babies.

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