(Closed) Inviting family member to your wedding that did not invite you?

posted 5 years ago in Etiquette
Post # 16
Member
3870 posts
Honey bee
  • Wedding: October 2015

FutureMrsW2015:  You should invite who you want to be there, regardless of if they invited you or not. In my own wedding planning experience, I’m seeing these situations as free passes. Meaning, if I was not invited to your wedding, I don’t necessarily feel obligated to invite you to mine. I’m not going out of my way to be vindictive, but now I don’t feel pressured about including everyone. For example, FI’s cousin got married last year and I was left off the invite list (me being the only SO of any of the cousins). Fiance chose not to go to said wedding. Now when we’re making our guest list, we are really trying to shave down our list and have a small intimate wedding. We simply don’t have the budget to invite all of FI’s THIRTY-TWO FIRST COUSINS, so we are making cuts where necessary. 

Post # 17
Member
11520 posts
Sugar Beekeeper
  • Wedding: May 2014

FutureMrsW2015:  My Uncle didn’t invite us to his wedding a few years back.  I was pissed.  I was fully prepared to make the trip but he didn’t invite us (both my local siblings were invited – but not their live in SOs…don’t get me started).

Darling Husband didn’t want to invite them, but we did.  They couldn’t make it, which was expected.

None of my other family has gotten married since I was 8 (and when I was little I was invited to all their weddings).  Actually, that’s a lie, my dad and both his parents eloped for their second marriages so obviously no one was invited.

Bottom line – invite who you want, but don’t use ‘he didn’t invite me…’ as a reason.  We’re adults.

Post # 18
Member
949 posts
Busy bee

FutureMrsW2015:  One of my cousins had a very small, “immediate family and grandparents only”-type wedding when he got married 3-5 years ago. I’ve still invited him and his family, because I don’t feel at all snubbed by the lack of invite to his wedding.

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