(Closed) Inviting new friends?

posted 4 years ago in Etiquette
Post # 3
1507 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: May 2014

@LilySarah:  Why not just send them a save the date in a few months?  Theirs doesn’t have to be at the same time as everyone elses’, especially if they won’t know anyone else invited.

Post # 4
3672 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: October 2013

@LilySarah:  I think they would be honored 🙂 It is a great thing to be invited to join in someones big day!

Post # 5
1063 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: June 2016

@LilySarah:  save the dates are not required. you can hold off and give them a regular invitation

Post # 6
2534 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: March 2014

I’m in the same situation – we met some new friends on a cruise right before we got engaged. They’ve been great, but we don’t see them all too much (and aren’t sure where things would be going with this friendship)

Quiet frankly I want to invite them because my portion of the guest list is so small.
I thinkmy list is 30% of our 100+ people getting invites. I want to feel like I have somebody there!

Post # 7
2188 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: March 2024

I think it’s fine to just see how the friendship develops and just send an invitation if you choose when you send them out.


Post # 8
1155 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: June 2014

Posting so I can follow- we might end up in this situation too. Plus I am starting a new job in October and it’s a small office.

Post # 9
1116 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: September 2012

We had a similar situation.  We sent out our save the dates pretty early (my bad..) and between the time they went out and the time our invitations went out we became closer with a few new friends.  When it came time to send invitations we just invited them.  They never knew about the save the dates and IF they did they would have known they went out before we had become friends.  So in my opinion you don’t have to send everyone that is invited to your wedding a save the date.  I even did that with other people, not including new friends.  I sent save the dates to people we KNEW for sure would be invited, family, close friends and other’s i didn’t, just in case things changed.

Post # 10
3771 posts
Honey bee
  • Wedding: August 2013 - Brookfield Zoo

Just send the invitations when you send them; no save the date.  10 months is a LONG time, and you never know how this new relationship could pan out.  I was in the same boat with friends at work and a long engagement; relationships can really change a lot within that time.

Post # 11
8474 posts
Bumble Beekeeper
  • Wedding: July 2012

I was in a similar situation with a few friends I made in grad school. I didn’t invite them. I don’t know, it just seemed too soon to invite them to a function like that. Plus I was adamant about having a small guest list. 

Post # 12
1837 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: November 2012 - Oak Tree Manor

Oh I think it’s fine.  We were in a pretty similar situation, and we both ended up inviting each other to our weddings (since the other couple was engaged and their wedding was a couple weeks before ours). I’m so glad we went to each other’s weddings because now we’re close friends and it’s nice to be able to reminisce!

Post # 13
2219 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: August 2013

@LilySarah:  you dont have to send them a save the date at all for them to be invited, so I’d just skip it, or maybe send one in like…. february?as long as the STD doesnt have a sent out on date then it doesnt matter when you send it 🙂

If they live in the same town its not like they’ll have to make travel arrangements, so I think your fine.

Post # 14
2278 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: October 2013

We sent out invitations to newer friends/couples that we wanted to invite to the wedding, after we’d been friends for a few months. We hadn’t sent them a save the date, but we told them we were hoping to be able to invite them 🙂

Post # 15
78 posts
Worker bee
  • Wedding: April 2014

I think you should invite them. Is your wedding taking place in the same town where you all live? Maybe a STD isn’t necessary? 

FI and I are in a similar situation, we’ve made some new friends this past year, but we’re not as close with them as other friends that we’ve known longer. However, these “newer” friends have expressed their happiness/excitement with our engagement, so we thought it would be nice to invite them to the wedding. We’re having a DW, so we’re going to send them STD’s either way. If the friendships happen to fizzle between now and the wedding, then I doubt they would feel pressured to go or think we were being pushy/gift grabby. 

Invite them 🙂

Post # 16
582 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: May 2013

we held off on a few STDs for this reason, and just sent the invite.  it’s nice because of those (newer friends) who accepted, it was a nice gesture of their wanting to continue/deepen the friendship.

you can either go that route, or as others mentioned, maybe mail their STD later than the rest…your wedding date is in July, so maybe in January?

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