(Closed) Inviting (Or Not) Significant Others

posted 7 years ago in Etiquette
Post # 3
Member
8353 posts
Bumble Beekeeper
  • Wedding: March 2011

I left the plus ones open. If my guests wanted to bring an extra person, I let them. I do did not feel comfortable using a cutoff.

Post # 4
Member
7173 posts
Busy Beekeeper

Yes; I did a +1 for most single guests (even if they weren’t in a relationship), because I appreciated that when I was single and not dating.  I did get some interesting guests, from those not dating anyone (like their MOM’s or BFF’s as a guest!!). 

Post # 5
Member
3126 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: December 2017

Anyone in a serious relationship, whether they were living together or not, received a +1. However, we did not give coworkers +1s, even our married coworkers, because we did not have the space. Since I am the boss, I felt obligated to invite everyone or no one and since someone at work is throwing a bridal shower for me, it ended up being everyone.

Post # 6
Member
297 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: September 2011

I haven’t sent my invites out yet. My take on it is that if it is the person is serious enough with their partner that you would have them at Christmas dinner than they are invited to the wedding. If it’s someone that they aren’t in a relationship with by the time I send the invites out I am mostly not putting and guest.

Post # 6
Member
297 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: September 2011

I haven’t sent my invites out yet. My take on it is that if it is the person is serious enough with their partner that you would have them at Christmas dinner than they are invited to the wedding. If it’s someone that they aren’t in a relationship with by the time I send the invites out I am mostly not putting and guest.

Post # 7
Member
6572 posts
Bee Keeper
  • Wedding: February 2010

We said as long as they were in a serious relationship. One friend started her relationship a month before the wedding and asked to bring her bf. We said no, we just didn’t have the space.

Post # 8
Member
464 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: June 2011

I did a plus one for everyone. I didn’t want to be unfair to anyone and some of my closest friends recently started dating people so I didn’t want to have to tell them they weren’t allowed to bring their new boyfriend when others are allowed. Way easier to just allow them to bring a guest if they choose to and keep all our guests happy.

Post # 9
Member
152 posts
Blushing bee

I plan on inviting +1s, just because I don’t think it’s my place to judge how serious another person’s relationship is.  Plus, when I was single, I didn’t want to go to weddings alone, and appreciated getting a +1 on my invitation.  I still did go alone, if I wasn’t seeing anyone, but I appreciated the gesture.

Post # 11
Member
706 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: October 2011

We don’t have many single guests; but are only allowing SO’s in the case of siblings and one cousin, who’s been with SO for longer than Fiance and I (and we both know both parties).  I have another cousin who has been in an on-and-off relationship for I don’t know how long.  I don’t know how serious they are.  But, I’ve never met him, so he will not be extended an invite.  So I took it case by case, and didn’t have a blanket rule. 

Post # 12
Member
566 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: May 2011

I hate cut-offs that are based on living arrangements.  It doesn’t make any sense to me.  Some people move in together after 2 weeks.  Does that mean they love each other more or that their relationship will last longer than a relationship of people who have been together for a year but aren’t living together?

If you have the room and can afford it, invite all singles/dating couples with a +1.  If you can’t, I personally think you should refine your guest list. (I understand that the original poster is not asking for advice, but I’m just stating my opinions on this.)

Post # 13
Member
5547 posts
Bee Keeper
  • Wedding: December 2011

As someone who doesn’t live with my Fiance, I think that is NOT a good judge of seriousness. Nor is some time limit on dating, to define someone elses relationship on your terms in not kind. 

Post # 14
Member
4606 posts
Honey bee
  • Wedding: March 2014

I haven’t sent out invites or anything because I have a while to go, but when FH and I made our guest list we gave some people +1 and not others. We’re not going to have the room, but we plan to invite married couples and people who are in serious relationships whether they are living together or not.

 

Post # 15
Member
4653 posts
Honey bee
  • Wedding: August 2013

We are not doing a +1 for everyone we dont have the room in the budget or the space… Me and Fi say if its someone we havent met why would we want them at our wedding? And everyone at our wedding is going to know someone else so i dont think its that big of a deal… If we have room left over if people rsvp no then maybe then… (depends who still is on the b list)

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