(Closed) Inviting some family to all, others to just the evening?

posted 7 years ago in Etiquette
Post # 3
3267 posts
Sugar bee


Q:  Why do I have to allow dates? 

A:  You do not.  You must invite social units (married, engaged, living togethers) together.  But you don’t have to invite anyone’s boyfriend/rent-a-date.


In response to the rest of your post.  I wouldn’t open it up later.  That is more impolite then simply not inviting people.  Also, think of your bill if loads of extra people come afterwards. It also makes the A list and B list very obvious which is obviously impolite.

Invite who you want and can afford to host and the rest be dammed.  I am quite close to certain family members but really I don’t care if they don’t invite me to their weddings.  I like going to weddings but it just isn’t that big of a deal to me.  I bet many of your guests feel the same way. 


Post # 5
220 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: July 2014

i have a simliar situation, my nan is one of 7 children, great anuts and uncle, cousins 2nd cousins etc, but there are some family who i speak to nearly every day, vs some family who we only see occasionally, and although get on fantastically, dont speak to as often.

i thought about who i would really want to be there, and who i would regret not inviting.

its such a hard one, but i totally agree with the PP, keep the ‘units’ together, as it would be unfair to be the only one out of your household not invited, but just explain to the family that its a cost you cant cover to invite everyone, im sure theyll understand! (i did this and some of the family members offer to pay for themselves as they said they understood the cost of it!)


hope it works out for you!

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