Post # 1
I got engaged a few weeks after I started working for a woman doing interior design as well as being her personal assistant. I worked in her home everyday. We were never close “friends” but got along pretty well professionally.
I decided that since we worked so closely together, I would invite her to my wedding. She would ask me every week how the planning was going etc., it was pretty much understood that she would attend my wedding.
Well this week she let me go because she can’t afford to keep me on. And while we still get along professionally, I feel it might be strange to invite her to my wedding in October if we won’t even be in contact now.
I haven’t sent out invites, but I still think it would be rude to un-invite her.
What do you all think?
It just bums me out that my ex-boss will take up 2 seats that my friend’s parents could have. And won’t it be weird when she is at my wedding introducing herself as the boss who had to let me go earlier this year? Awkward.
Post # 3
If it were me, I probably would not invite her, and invite your friends parents who you’ll probably have a longer lasting relationship with. If you don’t think you’re going to have much contact with your ex-boss anymore, I don’t see why you should have to invite her, especially if you never told her she was officially invited.
Post # 4
Although there was no official invitation, there was a verbal one. I did say she was invited. Yikes!
I think I’m going to skip on sending her a save the date and see if I hear from her at all.
She might not even want to come now, she might feel awkward now!
Thanks for the advice
Post # 5
That’s a good plan. Don’t send her an STD, see how it goes, and if you don’t talk to her by invite time – she’s out.
I’m sure she’ll understand 🙂
Post # 6
Yes, that’s a great idea not sending the save the date and wait to see if you hear from her. If not, then you’re off the hook…lol
Post # 7
You have already issued her a verbal save the date. So I think you are etiquettely obligated to invite her now.
And I don’t understand the wait to see if I hear from her. What polite person would ever call someone up and ask where their invite is? But what it may do is damage your professional reputation.
Post # 8
If you weren’t friends, is there any reason to think you’ll see her again? If not, I’d say forget the invite.
Post # 9
What I meant by waiting to hear from her is… I just think it might be strange to have 6 months pass by where we don’t talk/email and suddenly she shows up to my wedding and have to introduce her as my ex-boss.
It’s a tricky situation. But now I’m starting to feel like I have to invite her.
And about the unpolite people looking for invites…they exist! I’ve had two people facebook message me about when they should expect their invitations. I haven’t seen these people in over a decade.
Post # 10
YOur wedding isn’t until October, trust me by then it will have been so long since you’ve spoken she might not even remember your wedding was going to take place. And it might be less awkward for her too if you just don’t invite her. You aren’t breaking any etiquette rules technically since you never sent her an invitaiton or STD.
Post # 11
I honestly think it really is up to you if you want to invite her or not. Though you did do a verbal and to me at least that would mean you should be sending her paper one to.