(Closed) Inviting yourself to a wedding

posted 5 years ago in Guests
  • poll: Should I invite her or not?

    Yes

    No

  • Post # 2
    Member
    1023 posts
    Bumble bee
    • Wedding: December 2016

    People are literally the worst and love to invite themselves to weddings. Seriously, she’s out of line to have inited herself. Don’t invite her and dont feel bad about it.

    Post # 3
    Member
    3437 posts
    Sugar bee
    • Wedding: September 2017 - Poppy Ridge Golf Course

    Since you were iffy on inviting her before she invited herself I would say no. Its pretty rude to invite yourself to someones wedding, you never know their circumstances. With the extra guests that come with her adding to your cost this becomes a hell no. 

    But its up to you. I personally wouldnt care about any tension that may or may not happen later. She seems like an associate at best not a close friend.

    Post # 4
    Member
    1118 posts
    Bumble bee
    • Wedding: July 2017

    Is it rude of her to ask? Yes absolutely. You should invite her if she would have been invited originally, if she wouldn’t have made the final guest list then don’t invite her and tell her you were trying to keep the wedding small. To not invite her to make a point is just going to start drama and stress you don’t need. 

    Post # 5
    Member
    2260 posts
    Buzzing bee
    • Wedding: October 2020

    I would keep her on your maybe list. Maybe she think she’s being funny? Either way if you didn’t initally want her there, I don’t think you should change your plan now. 

    Post # 6
    Member
    10306 posts
    Sugar Beekeeper
    • Wedding: City, State

    We’ve had someone literally invite themself to our wedding as the guest of another guest. I’ve never even met them in person! 

    Post # 7
    Member
    812 posts
    Busy bee
    • Wedding: October 2017

    I’ve had friends point blank ask if they were invited, so I point blank told them that we’re keeping the wedding as small as possible and if we had a million dollars we’d be inviting as many people as we wanted. They all got the message. If you want to invite this person, great, if not, you don’t have to. The fact that she’s brought it up twice makes me think she’s just an annoying person in general, so personally I wouldn’t invite her, but if you don’t have to decide yet, then let it simmer for a bit and see how you feel.

    Post # 9
    Member
    749 posts
    Busy bee
    • Wedding: November 2015

    Girl I went through the same thing; some distant family kept saying “oh I can’t wait for my invite,” or “I better be there!” and I was nervous because I didn’t want them to hold it against my dad (his relatives) or be weird the next time I saw them.

    I eventually ended up not inviting any of those self-inviters and it was marvelous. It’s YOUR wedding and unless that person was like your grandparent or something you aren’t really required to have anyone there who you don’t want there. If it makes you feel better the people who I didn’t invite got over it and are just fine. If it came up I would always just say “it’s a small wedding, we wish we could invite everyone but our venue just doesn’t allow it.” They’ll get over it. 😉

    Post # 10
    Member
    2617 posts
    Sugar bee
    • Wedding: September 2016

    I wouldn’t make her comments a factor in inviting her or not.  I wouldn’t purposely invite her, but I also wouldn’t not invite her out of spite.

    Post # 11
    Member
    253 posts
    Helper bee

    View original reply
    maraudergrl90:  Please if you can don’t invite her. I know the feeling, I have an uninvited guest at my wedding and it’s making me miserable.

    Post # 12
    Member
    28 posts
    Newbee
    • Wedding: July 2017

    View original reply
    maraudergrl90:  I would not invite her, ESPECIALLY after she keep trying to invite herself. If she continues to ask I would simply say we are having a smaller more intimate wedding, and leave it at that

    Post # 13
    Member
    135 posts
    Blushing bee
    • Wedding: July 2017

    This is a big no no and would get a no from me

    Post # 14
    Member
    744 posts
    Busy bee

    If you can afford it then I would invite her. 

    My philosophy for invites is that if somebody really wants to be there to share in our day then we will include them. 

    Post # 15
    Member
    1202 posts
    Bumble bee
    • Wedding: October 2016

    My coworkers said this and they were definitely just being silly. Most people who say those kinds of things already know that they won’t necessarily get an invite and have no malicious intentions. My coworkers just like booze and want to see me in a dress. 😛

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