- 5 years ago
- Wedding: July 2014
I really hope this doesn’t come off as bridezilla-y. I am trying so hard to be a “good bride” and take my friends/BM’s into consideration while we’re in planning mode. I’m basing my wedding colors off of whatever Bridesmaid or Best Man dress fits into their budgets and makes them all feel pretty, they will not be paying for a shower bc my relatives are taking care of it, and I’m not asking anything of them other than please just show up and wear the dress and have fun! No required makeup, hair, shoes, whatever. They are not my barbie dolls, lol.
In trying to be the best bride friend possible, I want to make sure I am also there to celebrate in all of their important occasions as well. This is something I would do anyway, obviously, but having them in my wedding, it makes me feel like it’s even more important that I be involved in their important occasions.
The problem is there are 6 of them and sometimes I don’t know how to make them all happy. For instance, one of my BM’s has a daughter who just turned a year old. She is having a party for her and I RSVPed quite some time ago that of course I would go. Then my MOH’s bday is around the same time and initially wanted to have her birthday dinner the same night. Told her I couldn’t make it and felt awful. So she changed it to another night but to a very expensive restaurant I just cannot afford. Knowing her, I knew I’d have to make up an excuse. She always makes her birthday into a BIG DEAL and although I love her, she can be a force to be reckoned with–I knew “I can’t afford it” wouldn’t be an acceptable excuse. So I made something up, feel awful about lying, and then told her I wanted to take her out at another time. She seems fine with it but I heard from another person involved that she’s not happy with me that I won’t be there for the dinner.
This is on top of my friends who AREN’T bridesmaids. I feel like I don’t have time for everyone and everything, and I’m feeling so guilty. I don’t want to be the friend who falls off the planet when she gets engaged, but I don’t know how to be everywhere and with everyone at once, without running myself ragged. We are planning a wedding, have limited funds for going out, etc., and are busy!! We are now juggling time with both of our families as well as with both sets of friends, and I just don’t know how to make it all work….