(Closed) Is a 1 yr 2 mo engagement normal/desirable?

posted 8 years ago in Logistics
Post # 2
785 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: April 2016

I’m in medical school and a 1-2+ year engagement is super normal because we are all super busy and planning is time consuming

Post # 3
133 posts
Blushing bee
  • Wedding: September 2015

I got engaged in 7/13 and am getting married in 9/15. We wanted to have a long engagement to save money for our almost 400 person guest list reception. We had already been together for 7 years but I knew I would need a two year engagement so we wouldn’t have any debt. There are times I feel it’s so far away but the time has gone by pretty fast!

Post # 4
468 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: October 2014

I’m also having a 14 month engagement, and I think it’s perfect. We will be married in October, and had we not started planning when we did, we wouldn’t have been able to book the venue we wanted on the date we wanted. If you live in a busy area that books up early, a long engagement is great. I love that we haven’t felt rushed and have really been able to enjoy the process without feeling like every spare moment was dedicated to wedding planning. Funny thing is, our engagement is the shortest of all of my friends and family, but again, where we live typically necessitates a longer engagement if you want your choice of vendors.

Post # 5
5979 posts
Bee Keeper
  • Wedding: June 2013

Almost every I know had an engagement that lasted almost a year so to me that’s the norm. Our engagment was one year and 2 months and I thought it seemed like good timing- I may have pinned a lot on Pinterest but I don’t think that’s necessarily a bad thing.

I’m not sure what you mean by “a lot has to be done within a 3 month time.” I didn’t find that to be true at all. We booked our venue a year out and had all of our other vendors six months out. The only thing that really *had* to be done within three months was send out the invites (which were prepared and ready to send out before three months out) and the seating chart. 

TBH, I don’t view a 14 month engagment as a long engagement. I think it’s pretty typical actually. I would have felt rushed and stressed trying to plan a wedding in 6 months. Also, most of our vendors were already booked about 9 months out so we wouldn’t have been able to get our first choice vendors.

Post # 6
4097 posts
Honey bee
  • Wedding: February 2013

View original reply
ruphiolis:  No such thing as an overall ideal for any couple. It depends on what stages you are in your lives. For example, my husband and I were together for 11 years before getting engaged, but that included high school, college, getting a better paying/ full time job, and learning to live together. Getting married a year into our relationship was definitely not an option. I didn’t even have my driver’s license at that point! 

Post # 7
694 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: Either Philadelphia City Hall or a small chapel.

I know couples who’ve been engaged more than 2 years and those who’ve gotten married less than one after they’ve met. Everybody is different. FH & I are going on the two year mark due to personal setbacks with each other and additionally, finances. It is like $85 for a marriage license in our city and neither of us are currently employed full-time. That money can go to much more than that. 

Post # 8
1526 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: July 2016

I can’t imagine planning a wedding in less than a year.  I’m not engaged, but my boyfriend knows that I need a year, or at least 10+ months.  I can’t imagine how difficult it must be to plan, book venues, buy a dress, etc., with less time than that.

Post # 9
134 posts
Blushing bee
  • Wedding: February 2015

My engagement is right around 14 months. When I was looking for venues most were already booked that far out so I can’t even imagine being able to plan in less time. 

Post # 10
2766 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: April 2015

The only person I know that planned a wedding in less than a year did a casual backyard affair, and mostly relied on her retired parents to find and contract the vendors.

In my area, most of the venues that cater to big events generally have their warm-weather weekend dates filled 2 years in advance. Regardless, whatever timeline you decide on should be best for you and your guests.

Post # 11
79 posts
Worker bee

I have planned two weddings (my sisters and my own) and I think that 8 months is really the minimum – not so much 3. Anything can be pulled off (and will be perfect;)) – but just to get in at the choice venue seems to be an 8 month wait. My engagement is going from 12/02/13 to 7/26/14 …I started in november planning wise and I feel it is perfect. I actually think you have a nice engagement length and more and more people are doing 2+ year thing

Post # 12
278 posts
Helper bee

View original reply
ruphiolis:  We got engaged on 12/14/12 and married on 04/05/14! So even longer for us! I just didn’t focus on wedding stuff much at all (besides picking the vendors) until about 6 months out to keep myself from getting too antsy! 

Post # 13
411 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: July 2015

View original reply
ruphiolis:  Our engagement is 2 years 1 month! I don’t see the rush in having a wedding – for me, the agreement to get married (i.e. engagement) is the real commitment, and the wedding is just a formality. I realise that a lot of people don’t share that view!

Anyway, we didn’t start planning until about a month ago and already things are booked up, including venues, photographers, caterers etc. We’re getting married July 2015, and if we’d waited much longer to start planning we wouldnt have had our choice of vendors. I’d rather have a longer engagement and actually have the wedding we wanted rather than a rushed engagement and wedding. That seems stressful! Relax and enjoy the process. I can’t believe we’ve been engaged for 10 months already, it’s flown by.

Post # 14
2037 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: September 2014

We got ring-engaged in March and are getting married in September. We’re doing a sort of weddingmoon/not-really-elopement weekend Fri-Sat, finger foods and cake back home with family Sunday afternoon. I’m hoping we save faster since we don’t need months to plan, and I’m ready to be married!

Post # 15
2499 posts
Buzzing bee

We got engaged 2.5 yrs ago. Not planning on getting married till Spring 2016. So, almost 5 year engagement here!

Take it at your own pace. There are no rules to follow. Just do what suits your situation. Congrats! 🙂

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