Post # 31
You are a much better friend than I am. If someone asked me to wear a dress that I couldn’t wear a proper bra or bustier under, I’d probably decline (and I’m a 34D).
Under the circumstances, I say go with the clear back bra if it looks ok from the front. And like others have suggested, maybe you can get a sheer lining for the back of the dress to match your skin tone? That might help camouflage the straps a bit.
Post # 32
Sticky bras only work if you basically have no boobs. That won’t help the OP.
OP, the bride put you in a crappy situation. I think the clear back bra is one of your only options so go for It. You are a good friend!!!
Post # 33
OP here. I so much appreciate the helpful and, um, “supportive” responses. Although I really don’t like the idea of even a clear bra strap showing, I think I’m going to order that bra at least to try it. It isn’t returnable so I may end up squandering some money. But there aren’t a lot of good alternatives, obviously.
I feel like showing any part of your bra, especially in a more formal dress, is not classy or appropriate. At the same time, I agree with whomever said that this is one of a number of lousy options. At this stage the options seem to boil down to (a) substantially modifying the dress, (b) having a bra show, or (c) being unsupported and uncomfortable.
By the way, I have not discussed this with the bride and will not unless it’s absolutely necessary.
Post # 34
Are you outright dismissing all the suggestions of a nude colored lining for the back? I could do this easily as a good home sewer, so I am sure your local seamstress would have no trouble whatsoever. The dress will look substantially the same from the back, but you will be able to wear a nude bra.
Post # 35
Sorry, I should have mentioned that. No I am not dismissing that but it seems like it would amount to a substantial modification of the “look” of the dress, which would impair the uniformity I know the bride wants. I’m hoping to find a less disruptive solution.
Post # 36
Have you talked with the other BM’s? Or,are you the only well endowed BM?
If it were me, I would discuss the situation with the bride. I would much rather have a Bridesmaid or Best Man add a nude illusion back than see a plastic back strap every time she turned around.
Post # 37
Have you taken the dress with you to an actual lingerie store? I had to do this with my wedding gown. They may be able to help, but ultimately I suspect you may need the clear stap bra. Would I love that if I was you? Nope! But, I’d love it a whole lot more than going braless with your cup size!!
i really give you credit for going the extra mile on this. I’d be so frustrated if I’d had two sets of cups put in only to realize it just wasn’t enough support. I’m sorry it’s been such a frustrating process- good luck!
Post # 38
I believe the other girls are using stick on bras. I’m the only one on the busty side but I don’t want to force everyone else to accommodate me. Although I think both an illusion back and a bra would be noticeable, you make a fair point about preferring the illusion back. I’m not too concerned about photos, almost all of which would be taken from the front, but during the ceremony my back would be toward the audience.
I went to a well-regarded department store in search of a low back bra/bustier and the consultant advised me to search online given my somewhat unusual needs.
THANKS for all the help and advice!!!
Post # 39
Did you mention your hair length in any of this? If long enough and will cover all or most of the strap, I wouldn’t even worry about it. Since the front is plunging, I’d even have somebody tack it together to hide what may show of the front. You’ll be fine.
Post # 40
My hair is shoulder length, unfortunately not long enough to cover any sins
Post # 41
What if you wore a nude cami to cover a bra? Tbh, if the bride wants uniformity, I don’t think she should have picked a dress that’s so difficult for large-breasted women to wear. Have you asked her which of the options you’re considering she would prefer?
Post # 42
the sticky bra I posted goes up to a Dear Daughter and I’ve seen girls that are bigger use it as well, it does wonders about helping to keep the girls together if you are wearing it under something else that also hold everything in.
I would take the sticky bra and turn it sideways since the dress is plunging. Then stick the bra to the underside of your boob and take the wing and pull it up and stick it to the part above your boob, this will create a little bit of magic lift. THis + sew in cups might be the solution.
Post # 43
Here is what I would try.
1. Stick with the plunge bra you have, ordering something that specific/expensive/unreturnable online likely won’t turn out comfortably.
2. Investigate the potential of having the front of the dress tacked together to give you another couple inches of coverage, then taping/sewing/pinning it to the line of your bra.
3. Add one of these extenders to the bra you’ve chosen to get the back a little lower.
4. Talk to a seamstress about sewing in a panel of navy fabric that follows the v-shape in the back of the dress, just moving that line of opaque fabric up and making the keyhole a little smaller while maintainting the shape. Seriously, seamstresses are fairy godmothers.
5. Find friends that are more considerate.
Post # 44
In looking at the actual bridesmaid dress you mentioned, I actually think this option is good! The lace is going to hide a lot of the parts where you notice that the strap isn’t your skin.