Post # 1
By the time we get married, FI and I will have lived together for over a year. We already have most of the household items that we would ever need, but are going to register at Bed, Bath & Beyond for a few extras. We are also considering doing a registry for our honeymoon to Ireland, but I am concerned as to how it will be received by our guests
ETA: I do not mean to sound gift-grubby, any of my guests’ presence alone will be enough of a gift to me!
Post # 3
I, personally, do not like them and wouldn’t give to one of them – it’s not to my taste. It makes me feel weird, to be honest, so I wouldn’t give to one.
My mother and her friends all think they are the most awful invention in the world and are extremely critical of them. They are all the kind of people who have no problems giving money, but the honeymoon registry rubs them the wrong way.
Post # 4
I personally don’t like them, and I think people from older generations might also be put off by them, but they’re so common these days that if you want to do it, there’s no way anyone can say it’s in bad taste.
Post # 5
Although I think it makes perfect sense for couples to choose to apply some of the money that they receive as wedding gifts to their honeymoon expenses if that is what they would like to do, I am not a fan of honeymoon registries.
Post # 6
Thanks ladies, these are all things that I was worried about!
Post # 7
I think it all depends on your guests and the circle you’re part of. In my circle, I don’t think there would be much of a problem with it, since most of my family/friends want to get me something, but know that FI and I have been living together for 4 years (dating for 6) and have a child together. If guests know that the last thing you need is a blender, they will either give you cash, a gift card, something on your registry, or ask you. The honeymoon registries I’ve seen were pretty tasteful (you pick your location and people can buy you meals, activities, or something like a day at the spa). I know a lot of guests prefer to buy something physical (that silly Aunt Irma that always gives a punch bowl), but others don’t want to get you something you won’t use. The only way I’d say that it wouldn’t be received well is if you’ve over-spent on your wedding and gotten a lot of elaborate things you didn’t necessarily need. If I was a guest at a wedding and saw that you’re wearing a $10,000 dress, are eating filet mignon, and hired 10 bellydancers for your entertainment I would be very hesitant to give you money.
Post # 8
- Wedding: March 2012 - Pelican Grand Beach Resort
In a decade or two, probably not, but right now, they are still in poor taste. I personally don’t want to be part of the experiment to change that perception. I’d rather just accept the cash and not run the risk of offending anyone.
Post # 9
- Wedding: August 2013 - Rocky Mountains USA
I’ve got a question for those that think the honeymoon registry is in poor taste. Say you’ve been with your sweetie for 10+ years and have most of the house stuff you need. But maybe you want to upgrade your dishes set, get some towels, and a few other basics. Mainly, you are pretty broke and would love MONEY! (Of course, of course, the guests’ presence at your wedding is really the most important thing – very truly. But for those who do want to bring a gift as well, see above.)
How do you set up a registry so as to increase the chances of this happening, without a honeymoon registry? Just have a few things ( a few dozen, say, for 150 guests ) on the registry and let them assume?
Would love your ladies’ input – thanks!
Post # 10
- Wedding: March 2012 - Pelican Grand Beach Resort
@lolot: Yes, you have a limited registry for the things you really want and then you make sure that your parents know you are hoping for money so that they can tell those who inquire. Quite a few family members and friends-of-family called me mom in the weeks before the wedding to ask whether we would prefer a gift or cash, and she knew what to tell them.
Post # 11
I don’t have a problem with honeymoon registries whatsoever…but A LOT of people don’t like them. See my recent post:
As you can see…it trends to a strong no. I ended up not doing the honeymoon registry based on the negative feedback. I put up a small registry with 8 items on it. Maybe someday it will be more accepted, but for now, I’m not willing to potentially offend my guests for it.
Post # 12
@mrsSonthebeach: That sounds like the best solution, thank you!! 🙂
Post # 13
- Wedding: May 2013 - Walt Disney World
We are having a honeymoon registry (Sandals vacations). We have been living together for a while and have two of nearly everything. I don’t see a problem with it, escpecially since we have everything we need. If they don’t give to the honeymoon registry it wouldn’t offend us, since gift-giving isn’t a requirement. Ultimately, guests will give if they want to and will give whatever they are comfortable with. If they do have a problem with it, oh well. I’m not going to register for things we don’t want or need.
Post # 14
It doesn’t bother me at all, and one of my friends that got married in September had one so I bought her a gift off of there since I was unable to attend the wedding. They had already been living together for quite a few years and I was going to give them money anyway so it was just as easy.
Post # 15
I would agree with PPs and say that it really depends on your social circle.
In mine, our families and friends are all really into traveling, so they thought it was a fantastic idea. We set one up (in the style of the giver funding a specific experience, not just a honeymoon piggy bank) and it’s gotten at least as much use as our “traditional” registry. We’re going to Hawaii and some people chose very specific gifts on the honeymoon registry because they had been to Hawaii and wanted us to have an experience that they did. But we do have both so people can pick whichever they are more comfortable with.
Post # 16
@lolot: You could do what quite a few of my friends have done. They set up a small registry for items/gifts they wanted upgraded then set up a link for guests to purchase Visa/AMEX gift cards through MyRegistry or just simply informing the guests.