(Closed) Is an RSVP too much to ask for?

posted 7 years ago in Etiquette
Post # 3
413 posts
Helper bee

People are so rude and inconsiderate when it comes to RSVP’s!!!

My daughters shower is this weekend and no one on her Fiance side responded.  His mom said, and I quote, “we’re not real good at that sort of thing” REALLY?  Pick up the phone, dial the number listed and say you will or won’t be there! 

We just sent the wedding invites and they are trickling in but even though I have been reading posts on here for months about this issue, I don’t think you can understand how necessary it is until you have to deal with it.

RSVP people! 

Post # 5
1766 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: April 2011

Our wedding is in four days.  We still don’t have all the RSVPs back, lol.  Future Mother-In-Law called everybody who had not RSVPed.  Some said “Oh, I was just about to mail it back!”  That was two weeks ago.  Still haven’t gotten it.

The most fun are the guests who RSVP and then after you gave the venue the final head count, they change their mind about coming/not coming/their meal.

Post # 6
212 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: September 2011

Oh gawd, I am sooo worried about this when I get to that point! Although I admit, in the past, I have waited pretty long to send in RSVPs if I don’t remember to do it right away. Some people are just forgetful. But if you call them and remind them, there’s no excuse. And to say they haven’t made up their mind yet is just ridiculous! Tell them YOU’VE made up your mind to UN-invite them! Haha. Wink

Post # 7
187 posts
Blushing bee
  • Wedding: May 2011

Our RSVP date was April 1st and we’re still waiting on 38 responses.  YES, 38!!!


Post # 8
241 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: November 1999

@hotchocolate: I second that hot chocolate.  I’d say “well our venue needed the head count by today, so since you haven’t made up your mind I’ll count you as not attending.” They can’t argue with an excuse like that.

I’m also dreading my invites, but I have not problem being a [email protected] to people that don’t respond in a timely manner.  My venue is expensive at $133 per head.  If I can drop you, I will drop you.  HA!

Post # 9
5786 posts
Bee Keeper
  • Wedding: May 2011

@posh_princess: I really wish I had put a note on a cards “If you RSVP after the due date you will be given chicken tenders to eat and will not have access to the open bar, kthxbye”

Not a single member of FIs family has RSVP’d including his parents.

Post # 10
3482 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: February 2011

I noticed it was my friends who had gotten married recently who had the RSVPs back to me so lightning quick I didn’t think the mail could work that fast, lol. Guess everyone eventually forgets what it’s like to camp out at your mailbox waiting for the last ones to trickle in.

Honestly, the things are stamped and printed out, all you have to do is write your name, check a box/write a number, address it, seal it and drop it in the mail the next time you leave the house! It’s not rocket science, people!

Post # 11
1488 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: March 2012

@posh_princess: I totally thought you meant you second getting hot chocolate. I was like WTF? When did I miss this? haha

Anyway, I’m not looking forward to recieving (or not) the RSVP cards. We aren’t even close to sending invitations out but I’m seriously considering a line somewhere that says “if you don’t reply back to me even after I call you you’ll be sitting on the dock alone with no food.” I don’t kid around.

Post # 13
3978 posts
Honey bee
  • Wedding: May 2011

@LGenz: LOL! Seriously! I swear I almost included, “If you don’t RSVP feel free to come, as long as you don’t want to sit down or eat.” I like yours better!

Our RSVP deadline is still a month away but I’ve only gotten responses from maybe 5 invites. I think there is even less excuse when it’s online. It takes a grand total of 30 seconds to RSVP. Type in site, select RSVP, type your name, type your email, click yes or no, click Done. That’s it!


Post # 14
660 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: November 2011

We just sent out all of our invites.  I’m so nervous that my parents’ guest wont’ understand (culturally, we don’t do rsvps) and I wont know who’s coming are not…ahhhh!  I emphasized the importance of it, but who knows..fingers crossed that they understnd the importance of it.

I keep telling my parents that if they don’t follow up, I’m going to lose money.  Hopefully that will work. 😛

Post # 15
381 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: April 2011

UGH! This has been so annoying for me too! Our deadline was April 2nd and we are still waiting on 40 cards back! I’m also getting frustrated at all the people who have decided to email or text Fiance instead of sending in their card. It’s better than nothing, but I DID ALL THE WORK FOR YOU! Just drop it in your mailbox jeez! I don’t have much left to do for our wedding but everything I do need to do, involves knowing the final count.

Post # 16
572 posts
Busy bee

I am sooooo upset with folks that I could scream. Everyday I come home to maybe 1 RSVP in the mail. I’ve been chasing folks every since March 30 which was our deadline. Not only do I need to know if you are coming….i need to know what you want to EAT!! I’m also doing seating cards and table assignments.

I’m all for having a cut off…which will be this Friday. I like the idea of telling them that I had to give my final count.

It is not hard people!!! I actually had someone tell me they did not read down that far (meal choice) and another tell me it did not have a respond date (It is only the second line of text).

I’ve only heard from 87% of our guest list. Many of the last one’s were verbal AFTER we chased them down. UGH!!!

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