(Closed) Is anyone not having a bridal shower/bachelorette party?

posted 7 years ago in Traditions
Post # 16
Member
2292 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: September 2013

I didn’t have a bridal shower.  I don’t have a lot of family in my area (and most of my bridesmaids lived out of town too) and honestly, no one offered to throw me one.  I wasn’t really offended though, because I didn’t even know who was supposed to offer!  It didn’t really seem necessary to me, so it wasn’t a big deal.  I did have a lovely bachelorette party though- my Maid/Matron of Honor planned a really fun day/night.  No crazy Vegas trips or anything, and my only rule was no penis paraphernalia (which was respected!).  ๐Ÿ™‚

Post # 17
Member
142 posts
Blushing bee
  • Wedding: August 2014

I think my case is the opposite of most. My Maid/Matron of Honor, along with help from my mother, threw me a lovely bridal shower when I went home to visit around Easter. It was really nice, especially since I never thought I’d get to have a shower, living so far away and all. However, I won’t be having a bachelorette party. I moved to my FI’s home country to live with him, so my friends here are mostly his friends, and mostly guys to boot. It bums me out sometimes when people ask me about my plans and I have to admit that I don’t have a lot of girlfriends, but Fiance has been really sweet about it, asking his guys if we can throw a joint celebration instead. We’ll see how it pans out, but I try not to let it get me down!

Post # 18
Member
416 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: June 2015 - Historic house and gardens

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coffeedrinker:  I am doing the exact same as you. Small wedding, no wedding party and therefore no bridal shower/hen’s night.

I don’t have a lot of close female friends either, so it just isn’t really an option.

I did feel a bit sad about it at first, but then I realised that it’s not really my thing anyway, so I’m glad it’s one less thing to worry about.

Post # 19
Member
318 posts
Helper bee

I’m not planning on having a bridal shower. Part of it is that I think we will likely have a very small wedding, so it limits who I would feel comfortable inviting. I also just have not been that crazy about the bridal showers my family throws. You really have to be ok with being the center of attention, and in my family it means games and getting a lot of gifts for the house. I’ve been living on my own so long it just seems unnecessary to get so many household items. My family asked to throw me one and I’ve declined, so no disappointment here. I would have liked to have an engagement party, though.

Post # 20
Member
349 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: August 2014

No bridal shower for me! My friends and family were scattered so I didn’t want everyone flying in and spending so much $$$ just to come give me more gifts! I have a lot of close girlfriends so we did have a kick butt Bachelorette weekend in Vegas. Wouldn’t do it any other way!

Post # 21
Member
643 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: March 2015

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coffeedrinker:  I’m not having a shower but my sister is ADAMANT about throwing me a bachelorette party and I’m gonna go with it ๐Ÿ˜‰

Post # 22
Member
9120 posts
Buzzing Beekeeper
  • Wedding: August 2013 - Rocky Mountains USA

I didn’t have a bridal shower and I totally didn’t miss it.  My friends and family are scattered all over the country, and it felt too self-centered and gift-grabby to ask them to fly to us twice.

Do you live near your sisters?  It’d be fun to go on a cool adventure with them as a low-key bachelorette thing…

Post # 23
Member
216 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: September 2014

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coffeedrinker: Another “Boston” bride ( abit older than average ๐Ÿ˜‰ )- larger wedding  (125+)- next to non existent bridal party….Grooms friends are throwing him a big bar crawl limo driven type thiing. Same night, over night, down the cape for me with a few of my closer friends just for day at the beach, dinner and cocktails and MAYBE a couple dancing hours at Sundancers. Perfect for me! Just do what you are comfortable with.

Last night we did a 5 girl casino dinner and cocktails get together for my friend who getting married in 3 wks. Anything goes now a days.

Post # 24
Member
376 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: May 2015

 

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coffeedrinker:  This made me smile. After I asked my sister to be my Maid/Matron of Honor she called me saying to give her a list of everyone that i wanted to attend the engagement party/bridal shower/bachellorette party- My response- “No thanks, I just want them at the wedding” My mom thinks I will come around but as some previous people stated- I live further away so people will already have to travel for the wedding and I dont want to inconvenience by planning another event plus I would rather have nothing than just like 2 people make it for a bachellorette party. I told them no rehearsal dinner either but my mom and sister told me they discussed it and there has to be a rehearsal dinner. I think with the day/age deciding against “tradition” isn’t that uncommon. It does crack me up that people always say the “its your day”.. wait until you go against certain traditions and see them change their minds and start saying “you have to have a rehearsal dinner”, “you have to register”, “there has to be a seating plan”. I think my mom and sister will end up more stressed than I will during all of this because my response is “ok you can put that together then :P”

Post # 25
Member
231 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: September 2014 - Lubeznik Center for the Arts

We are having a small shower, but no formal bach party. People have offered, but we aren’t super big party people and everyone is so busy, so many of our friends have kids, ect. We are going to go out for dinner after the shower, and who knows, maybe that will turn into an informal bach party, but….it’s not something super important to me/us.

Post # 26
Member
123 posts
Blushing bee
  • Wedding: Tarp Chapel

My lovely mother and bridesmaids are getting together to throw me a shower, and I only have a 50 person wedding list. It’s going to be small, and honestly all of my kitchen and housewares are mostly from the dollar store, so I would love to get some new things for our house. But above all, I want to enjoy the company being around my friends and family members from mine and FI’s sides. I think it it will be fun, alot of great conversation. I really think I would have regretted not having one.

as far as a bach. party goes, I am also spoiled by my BMs and they are throwing me a Barbie Doll themed bash at a local casino/hotel resort. It’s going to be on Halloween, and everybody is going to dress up like their favorite barbie. I will be bridal barbie ofcourse. ๐Ÿ™‚ It’s going to be a night that I will (hopefully) always remember, it’s just a small get together with my favorite girls. I wasnt planning on a bach party, but the BMs insisted! ๐Ÿ™‚ Can’t turn down a good time plus a great Halloween.

Post # 27
Member
919 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: August 2014

I was all for skipping the bridal shower, but my mum and FI’s mum were devasted when I told them that.  When I saw how excited they both were about planning it, I decided to go along with it and I’m glad that I did.  They kept it low-key and casual and we all had a lot of fun.

In my case, I didn’t see the point of a bachelorette party.  My girls are spread out and there’s no need to further burden them.  We are having a bridesmaids slumber party at my place after the rehearsal, the night before the wedding.  Saves them from having to drive back and forth and we get to have a girlie night in!

Post # 28
Member
3827 posts
Honey bee
  • Wedding: November 1999

i had a very small bachelorette and i declined multiple requests for bridal showers. i absolutely hate them and since we had a buck and doe i really didn’t like the idea of a bridal shower. it just felt wrong to me to ask so much of people just because i was getting married. 

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