(Closed) Is anyone else not having a baby shower?

posted 6 years ago in Pregnancy
Post # 3
Member
1735 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: August 2012

My second child I didn’t my first it was kind of a family bbq co-ed no games nothing frilly.

Post # 4
Member
1263 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: September 2009

If your friends aren’t in baby-mode, have you thought of doing more of a party – with male and females?  An evening of appetizers (and cocktails for those who can drink!) to celebrate your upcoming life change?  You could still register and people would likely still bring gifts. 

Post # 5
Member
1228 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: October 2010

We sort of did. My friend really wanted to throw me one, but since I was looking at a baby shower as basically an invitation to buy me a gift, I only wanted super close friends invited because I didn’t want the friends I am not as close with to think that I was just trying to get a gift from them. So, I would have only felt comfortable inviting like 2 friends, I live about 30 miles away from my work so would not feel comfortable asking coworkers to make that drive, I have no relatives at all that live in my state, and my husband’s relatives are notoriously flaky and half of them wouldn’t show even if they had RSVP’d. So, my friend would go to all that trouble and maybe have like 6 people there, and I would have felt like a huge loser. On top of that, I am pretty shy and hate being the center of attention.

So, my husband’s sister and I organized a joint party which we very carefully did not call a shower, just a celebration for the baby and also for her son’s second birthday. We had about 15 people show up (naturally about half the guest list on my husband’s side either cancelled at the last minute or just didn’t show at all) and had a BBQ and my nephew opened all the presents (even those for the baby). That was great because my nephew really kind of took the heat off of me and we still got a nice day with those who bothered to show up.

 

Honestly I am pretty iffy about showers because I do think they are basically asking for gifts, and as someone who spent their lifetime surrounded by gimme pig family members, I am pretty touchy about that.

Post # 6
Member
441 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: June 2011

I’m not having one before the baby. Maybe after the baby though when we go back to my hometown. One of my friends did this and it worked out well. I’ve had one of my friends offer to do one here, but I don’t really know many people here to make it worth it.

Post # 7
Member
879 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: September 2012

I have two kids, and no baby shower for etiher of them.  And the games that some people play….guess the melted chocolate in the nappy….I am sorry, but that is just gross.

I also did not have an engagement party, and won’t be having a bridal shower.

If I want a gathering of my friends, I just have it to enjoy the pleasure of their company.  I don’t need an ulterior motive. 🙂

Post # 8
Member
1115 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: September 2009

We just moved across the country and I left my whole family behind. I’ll only be back home once in February and it will only be for like a day for work. I don’t suspect anyone here will throw me a baby shower – we still haven’t made many new friends, so I’m pretty sure it’s just not happening.

Post # 9
Member
5296 posts
Bee Keeper
  • Wedding: January 1993

My BFF didn’t, although several of us wanted her to, lol. If you don’t want to have a full-out shower, maybe you can still register? I know BFF did that because several of us still wanted to get her something and she got a free gift card or the like for registering.

Post # 10
Member
389 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: July 2010

I’m not even pregnant yet, but I don’t know if I would have a shower. I’m pretty sure my Mother-In-Law would organize one for me because gifts are her “love language”, but I don’t have that many girlfriends, and I wouldn’t really want them to feel obligated to travel to the party or bring a gift.

I actually like the idea of a really small get-together with your inner circle of women. Sometimes it is really important to older women (like our mothers or aunts) to be part of this special time in your life and maybe share some wisdom. What if you just had lunch with your Mother-In-Law and SIL?

Post # 11
Member
9029 posts
Buzzing Beekeeper
  • Wedding: June 2011

I didnt have a bridal shower and I dont plan to have a baby shower if I can help it. My SIL mentioned throwing me one but I’d rather not have it. I am thinking of having a formal party after the baby is born instead, it is common in my area and this way its more of a celebration that the baby arrived safe and sound and people can bring gifts but usually would give gift cards or money. I prefer that to a shower.

Post # 12
Member
1110 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: September 2011

I didn’t have a wedding shower and will probably just have a pre-baby cookout or something. I hate showers. I have a lot of people asking me where I’m registered so we will still be registering if people really WANT to get us something for some reason.

Post # 13
Member
6009 posts
Bee Keeper
  • Wedding: May 2009

We didn’t have one with Addie, and we won’t with this one, either.  Honestly, I’m a little sad about it, but whatever.  Our parents bought Addie’s big ticket items (travel system, crib/changer combo, and mattress), and we did get a bunch of “Welcome, baby!” gifts after she was born, so that made me feel a lot better.  I just hope baby #2 gets some of the same treatment.  Not that we need a lot of stuff, but I want a big fuss to be made over him/her, too!

Post # 14
Member
3671 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: March 2011

We probably won’t.  I think people will send us some things but our family is so far away.  We’d have to drive over two days or fly which would be kind of expensive.  I’d love to make the trip down there but it just seems like overall it’d be more of a hassle than it’s worth.  We are still registering mainly for our parents but my husband’s family loves babies so they’ll probably send some things too. 

Post # 15
Member
3671 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: March 2011

@Mrs. Spring:  That’s my thing, I don’t even really care about getting a lot of things (although it helps).  I’m going to miss having a party that’s all about our little baby girl and celebrating her upcoming arrival. 

Post # 16
Member
2299 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: June 2010

I’m not having a baby shower. I had 2 bridal showers and didn’t really enjoy the experience so I’ve decided to just skip the whole thing. My Darling Husband and I don’t communicate with his family anymore. It doesn’t help that I live 6 hours away from all my family and friends.

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