(Closed) Is anyone planning to involve their entire bridal party in the toasts?

posted 4 years ago in Reception
Post # 2
912 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: December 2016

People don’t even really enjoy the “mandatory” toasts, much less 8 additional toasts. 


If you do this, I’d suggest that the toasts be pre-written (absolutely no off-the-cuff speaking) and timed (hence the pre-writing) so that it is the same length as your guests would sit for the MOH/BM speeches (combined)

Post # 3
10542 posts
Sugar Beekeeper
  • Wedding: August 2016

Please don’t make your guests sit though 10+ toasts. That is just way too much. I’ve been to weddings where everything in the wedding party gave a toast and it was awful. It always takes forever and it’s so boring for your guests.

Post # 4
4227 posts
Honey bee
  • Wedding: September 2015 - Hotel Ballroom

We chose to, with four groomsmen and three bridesmaids. We told them though that they had one minute each. It was actually quite sweet 🙂

Post # 5
3440 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: September 2017 - Poppy Ridge Golf Course

View original reply
hikingbride :  Agreed. PLEASE don’t do this. I’m sure it seems cute and has sentimental value to you but it will bore your guests to tears. The only toast we plan on is a brief one minute or less thank you to our guests so everyone is thanked and acknowledged at the reception.

Post # 6
1003 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: November 2018

Please don’t

or if you do, let them do it at the rehersal dinner… there is nothing worse than being a guest and just wanting to get to dancing and listening to 20 people drone on and on… it’s not open mic night and your speeches will take FOREVER.

Parents Bride, Parents Groom, Maid/Matron of Honor, Best Man, B&G… these are the only people who should have access to a mic.

Post # 7
1669 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: Disneyland - January 2016

If your Maid/Matron of Honor and Best Man don’t seem overly thrilled with giving toasts, they certainly aren’t mandatory. My Maid/Matron of Honor didn’t give a toast, and I didn’t feel like I needed to have the other bridemaids “make up” for it. I think you should talk to your bridal parties and see who actually wants to give a toast, and if no one feels comfortable speaking in front of everyone, then maybe there just won’t be any. 

Post # 8
1602 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: October 2016

I hate giving toasts. Please don’t ask all of your wedding party give a toast to make them feel “involved”. Guaranteed, at least one of them will feel the same as me and hate the idea but they might be too shy to say something. People should only give a toast if they want to and offer. It does not need to be the best man or the Maid/Matron of Honor if neither of those people actually want to 

Post # 9
1206 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: September 2015

Please don’t.  It’s painful enough to sit through a Bridesmaid or Best Man and Maid/Matron of Honor speech, I can’t imagine sitting through 10 even if they are 2 mins long.  I went to a wedding that had 2 Bridesmaid or Best Man and 2 Maid/Matron of Honor and it was so hard to sit through 4 speeches.  

Post # 10
1023 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: December 2016

We’re doing an unofficial open mic at our rehearsal dinner for everyone else to speak!

Post # 11
3067 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: September 2014

View original reply
droses :  Please do not do that to your guests. This would be more suitable for the rehearsal dinner.

If you are not extremely close to the couple, ususally the toasts are boring and long —not to mention 8!!!! And then you have the father of the bride speech too. So 9. 

If your sister doesnt love public speaking, maybe she can speak at the rehearsal instead, there is no mandate that the Maid/Matron of Honor MUST speak at the wedding.

Post # 12
1887 posts
Buzzing bee

I think that sounds quite long, but I appreciate the idea behind it. I personally think that only people who want to give speeches should give them, not necessarily the people who are “expected” to. So maybe think about who in your wedding party would be most excited to speak, and ask them to give one?

Post # 14
1744 posts
Bumble bee

I think those speeches mean more to those who are really close to the bride and groom … most likely those who would attend the rehearsal dinner.  To the rest of the guests they are something traditional, and therefore expected, but are only mildly cute/entertaining under the best of circumstances – when someone is very gifted at public speaking.  They are sometimes cringworthy.  I don’t think many guests would be saddened to have fewer speeches at the reception.  

Post # 15
10351 posts
Sugar Beekeeper
  • Wedding: March 2014 - Chicago, IL

I went to one wedding where every bridal party member gave toasts. IMO, it was weird and drug on forever, with a lot of inside jokes that were lost on the audiance.

Another wedding, which I liked a lot more included toasts from the best man, Maid/Matron of Honor, brother of the groom and father of the bride. The toast from the father of the bride was my absolute favorite!! So personal, and just lovely.

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