Post # 1
I’m a tall woman, 5’9. I’ve always loved my height and tended to wear heels to be even taller. I spent over 30 years of my life thinking that height was desirable in women, after all, models are tall, and women like to wear heels. (Though I knew men preferred to date someone a little shorter than themselves, in general). Although I’ve dated men as short as 5’6 and as tall as 6’4, 6′ – 6’1 was the “sweet spot” with my boyfriends, and I thought that this was because people would tend to pair off in such a way where the man was 3-4 inches taller, on average. Works great for eye contact with or without heels, lol. It was all very logical, in my head.
About a year or so ago, I found out from reading a bit of research that this is actually not true. Men prefer shorter women. Not just shorter than themselves, but shorter women in general are more desirable. Men don’t necessarily want women to be slightly shorter than them, men want short women – period. Women want tall men – period. This explains a few couples I know where the wife comes up to her husband’s waist, something I found as unusual, previously. It seems, actually, such couples are both the ideal height for mate attractiveness.
I hope this doesn’t offend anyone (tall or short). I’m not offended at all myself to discover that my height is not nearly as desirable as I thought. It might have affected my self-esteem in my teens but luckily in my early 30s it just makes me feel like it’s cool that I love something about myself that apparently isn’t socially desirable (to the point that I was completely oblivious to this all this time!) And, obviously, different people have different tastes and some men clearly love us tall ladies, I’m just speaking about a general finding I stumbled upon.
So my question to you ladies: Did you all already know this – that shorter women are more attractive to men? If you did know, is there such a thing as being too short, or is shorter always better? Is there an ideal attractive height for women?
Post # 3
I did already know this. I think the sweet spot is around 5’4. Prior boyfriends have told me that some women are too short, and therefore child like. I guess in that case people are talking about under 5′
Post # 4
@joya_aspera: i never really knew about men’s preferences but… i always wished i was short. i’m not tall, i’m quite average at 5’6″ but i am always soooo envious of tiny little things like… mila kunis. maybe in my mind short = skinny… but i’ve always feared being a towering monster of a woman haha. and i always loved being with super big guys who made me feel tiny and protected. our guy friends have an ongoing joke about their love of asian women. they are OBSESSED… and i think a large part of it has to do with their petite frames…
Post # 5
I already knew that as well. I agree that 5′-5’5″ has always seemed like the “sweet spot” to me. I think it has to do with the whole “skinnier is better” mentality because shorter people just seem smaller overall at any given size than their taller counterparts.
Post # 6
My Fiance and I must be oddballs because I’m 6’1″ and he’s 5’8″ lol
Post # 7
Honestly, I thought tall women were more desireable to men/women. I’m in the middle of the road at 5’6″, so not exactly ‘short’ but definitely not ‘tall’. The guys I’ve dated have always said they preferred someone my height, but who knows if they were telling the truth.
I know I prefer guys that are closer to my height. 5’8″ or 5’9″ was my ‘ideal’ height for a guy I dated. I dated a guy 2″ shorter than me, and while the height difference didn’t bother me, the fact that he was more slender than me did.
DH is 6″, so he’s taller than I thought I liked, but I’m comfortable with him.
Post # 8
I’ve always loved being short! I’m 5’2″ and can wear heels of any height without ever feeling self consious. I’ve also always dated tall guys – Fiance is 6’2″ and all of my previous BFs have been at least 6 ft tall.
Post # 9
I’m a shorter gal (5’3″) and I’ve never noticed this is its true! I’d think 5’5″ would be ideal (at least in my mind). But I have two friends who are VERY short girls (one is 5′, the other 4’11”) and I think they feel like guys pick on them about their height more than hit on them. Of course, I feel like guys “pick” on me about my height more often than they hit on me also, and I’ve got 3-4″ on them.
Fi is fairly short for a guy (5’9″ or so) but I have to be honest and say most of my past boyfriends were 6′ or over.
Post # 10
I am 5’4″ and I’ve always wanted to be taller. It doesn’t really bother me being so short, just one of those things I guess.My Fiance is 5’6″, so he’s very short for a man.. I don’t think he would like it at all if I were taller.
Post # 11
@joya_aspera: I didn’t know that any such factual evidence proved it per say, but I know I am quite short and Fiance loves it! He’s 5’11 and I come in at just over 5’0. I am the shortest woman he’s ever been with and says my stature is one of my best physical qualities to him. I on the other hand would love to be tall and bony thin ;P but short and curvy I be.
Post # 12
I’m 5’6″ but have always wanted to be tall. All my shoes have at least a 2″ heel, but most 4-5″. I am very envious of tall women.
Post # 13
@joya_aspera: I’ve heard it, but like with every other generalization I take it with a grain of salt.
I’m 5’4″ and I’ve always wanted to be tall lol. My height has never really hindered me in any way, though… I’ve always been attractive to men, I’ve always been able to wear heels, and I was able to “land” my 6’1″ SO without him thinking I’m too short for him or anything.
I too grew up thinking tall was the most desirable.. probably because models are tall.
I do know a few tall girls who are quite big, though.. and they are SO awkward. I feel bad for them. I am glad I’m not tall and large. Tall and lanky would be my preference, but I suppose 5’4″ “average” height will have to do.
I hate when people call me short, though. People who like me do it to bug me since they know it bugs me. I am not short.. I am smack dab “average” (not that I like that word either!).
Post # 14
Sorry, wasn’t finished my post. All my guy friends prefer small woman, not just short but petite in shape and stature.. I’m short, but not small in frame, and I don’t think that is more proffered then being tall. I think it all depends
Post # 15
@thegreeneyedkri: Mighten’t that “picking on” be a form of flirtation? I know that kinda sounds like pulling pigtails in kindergarten, but let’s face it, a lot of guys are kinda immature…lol!
Post # 16
Very interesting as almost all of the men that I know have explicitly stated a preference for taller women. I’m average height – 5’6″ – but I wear 4″ heels everyday to work and when I dress up. It’s always funny to see how shocked people are when I am in flip flops. I don’t really have a height preference but historically I’ve dated men between 5’11” – 6’3″.