Is Having Children a Right?

posted 11 months ago in The Lounge
  • poll: Is having children a right?
    Yes, anyone should be able to have children regardless of financial ability : (48 votes)
    23 %
    Yes, anyone should be able to have at least one child, regardless of financial ability : (18 votes)
    9 %
    No, people should only plan to have children if they reasonably believe they can support them : (141 votes)
    68 %
  • Post # 2
    Member
    2886 posts
    Sugar bee
    • Wedding: August 2018

    knotyet :  I personally find it pretty irresponsible to have children knowing that you can’t afford them. 

    Post # 3
    Member
    268 posts
    Helper bee

    If you aren’t financially able to have children, no, I don’t think you “should” have children. It puts you and said child/children in a tough position and *can* (not saying *will*) have difficult ramifications later on in life for you and the child.

    But, the “right” to have children is very different than “should” you have children.

    People grow up in all sorts of environments due to circumstances within and out of their/their parents control. I don’t think its always a determinate of how you end up as a person. Having money doesn’t mean you will raise good children, and being poor doesn’t mean you won’t raise good children.

    Post # 4
    Member
    949 posts
    Busy bee

    Morally speaking, on the most basic level no…one *shouldn’t* deliberately conceive a child that they can’t/won’t support, but that weight would be on their conscience. But realistically speaking, for the majority of people, they usually *can* support a child, they’re just not willing to make the sacrifices to do so. I don’t really think any of us are in a position to judge someone on whether they’re fit to be parents based on their income or whatnot. 

    Whether they should he *allowed* to have children they can’t support: Yes, yes they should. Their body, their choice. Some say that “some people shouldn’t be allowed to have children”, which is ridiculously terrifying, as it suggests that powers and authorities should force sterilization or abortions amongst unwilling people. I don’t think that’s what most people really mean (or think about) when they say: “People should have to get a license to have children”, but we’d be looking like communist China if we really wanted to support that idea. I don’t believe this is what you were alluding to in your OP, but I’ve seen this mindset growing more common so I just wanted to comment on that as well. 

    Post # 5
    Member
    442 posts
    Helper bee
    • Wedding: May 2019 - York, ME

    I think if people really want children, they can find a way to make it work financially. I’m not one of those people that thinks you need to own you home, have no debt, and $100k in the bank to be able to “afford” kids.  I think being able to afford kids means to provide them a safe, stable, home and the necessities of life – food, clothes, education, etc…

    My family grew up without a lot of money, but our home was full of love and we always had what we needed, just not always what we wanted.  I don’t think that people should plan on having children while planning to go on government assistance though.

    Post # 6
    Member
    7418 posts
    Busy Beekeeper
    • Wedding: October 2014

    You have the right to have children– or to not have children– as you see fit.  However, with rights come responsibilities.  You have a responsibility to care for the children you have.  This includes supporting them financially. While I am a big supporter of safety net programs, I am also a huge supporter of easy access to birth control (especially semipermanent options like implants and IUD’s) and increased sex education so that people who are not in a position to support another kid don’t accidentally have one.  Combine that with general career training and improved money management skills and we might have a greater % of people in better financial situations to raise their children.

    Post # 8
    Member
    7418 posts
    Busy Beekeeper
    • Wedding: October 2014

    FWIW the number of people who are on assistance and have no desire to ever get off of assistance is quite small. Be very careful that you are not reinforcing the negative stereotype of the welfare cheats who keep making babies just to get a bigger check.  It’s not like that here in the real world.

    Post # 10
    Member
    7418 posts
    Busy Beekeeper
    • Wedding: October 2014

    knotyet :  ” I’m always shocked when people tell me that they have a right to have children, regardless of their ability to care for them.”

    Does this happen to you often?  Because this sentence implies it is a frequent conversation.

    Post # 12
    Member
    579 posts
    Busy bee
    • Wedding: May 2015

    I hope every person who voted “No, people should only plan to have children if they reasonably believe they can support them” supports easy access to a full range of reproductive health services in their communities, including birth control and safe abortions. Consider making a donation to your local Planned Parenthood. 

    Post # 13
    Member
    12320 posts
    Sugar Beekeeper

    Having children is a right, but it’s also a responsibility that should never be taken lightly. 

    Post # 14
    Member
    7418 posts
    Busy Beekeeper
    • Wedding: October 2014

    knotyet :  this post didn’t upset me.  However, we are living in a time where the poor have become a convenient scapegoat for many of our country’s woes. Words are important. 

    Post # 15
    Member
    2072 posts
    Buzzing bee
    • Wedding: April 2018

    No it’s not a right. My friend & i joked last night that people should have a license to breed. A recently sold house next door to her, has been rented to the government as a half way house. The new neighbour is an ex gang member & just got out of prison. They left their 5 &6 year old in the house home alone all weekend until a neighbour called the police. They also encourage their kids to slip into neighbours houses & steal phones &laptops for their parents!

    I genuinely believe you should’ve have kids that you can’t afford. Too many people here on the unemployment benefit get pregnant & expect the government to give them more money- they will. Then you get the teenage girls who get pregnant so they can spend their life on the single mum benefit.

    Whereas my husband & I want 2 kids. Kids are expensive and we have waited until our early 30s to have them. We will be in a position to give them a comfortable life.

    Then again I was 1 of 6 kids. Our parents gave us a wonderful childhood but I feel like in the 90s life was simpler. All kids were really the same in the suburb I lived in. Nobody got expensive overseas holidays, iPads, cell phones are.

    I don’t know. I firmly believe people shouldnt have kids their can’t afford though as it’s not fair on the kids.

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