(Closed) Is it a compliment?

posted 8 years ago in Emotional
Post # 3
Member
46611 posts
Honey Beekeeper
  • Wedding: November 1999

Imitation is the sincerest form of flattery. That being said, you have a right to be annoyed and a right to keep your mouth shut from now on.

Simply answer questions with”I’m not sure yet”

Post # 4
Member
504 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: April 2011

I agree with julies1949. Apparently her ideas we’re not as great as she thought so she’s stealing yours. I’d have a huge case of the I don’t knows from now on.

Post # 6
Member
1553 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: June 2010

I know it’s super annoying.  When I bought my first house, I had a friend who copied everything I did (paint colors, window coverings, etc.) in her house.  It annoyed me no end, but I guess she just really liked what I did, so I tried to take it as the compliment it was…but it still irritated me.

In your case, I agree with the previous posters.  Be vague as much as possible.  Tell her you are undecided.  Tell her that your mom/sister/aunt has a few suggestions you’ve not seen yet. 

As for me, I’m a little evil, so I might even tell her that I decided to go with a few things I know I won’t do…and then later say I changed my mind and went with something else.

Of course, she might just have a hard time envisioning on her own what she’d like.  When she see/hears your ideas, they look good to her.   If you have time and this really is a friend, you might want to give her suggestions that would work with her theme and her preferences, but are something you know you won’t be using.  She may just need a little help.

Post # 9
Member
6661 posts
Bee Keeper
  • Wedding: May 2010

I would keep really quiet about my wedding plans if I were you. It’s one thing for her to get a really great idea from you that would improve/enhance the wedding she had already planned, but to just blatently copy your wedding shows that she’s unoriginal and doesn’t respect your wedding. We had a couple copy one of our ideas and were honestly flattered and didn’t care at all since they were married after us. But honestly what bride copies things like colors and theme?? I mean a wedding is almost like a window into the B&G’s soul so it’ sjust strange that she would want to copy someone else instead of doing what she always dreamed of.

Post # 10
Member
536 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: December 2010

@bells: I know how you feel, best thing to do is to only let close family members know.  You also want alot of things to be a surprise. 

Post # 11
Member
3709 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: May 2011

If it’s not too late…maybe you can tweak some of the ideas that she has already copied to makes yours even more unique. Also, don’t share anymore details. It’s hard not to….but if you get the urge to talk weddings, call up a mom or a sister so you don’t have to worry about your plans getting back to your friend.

Post # 13
Member
125 posts
Blushing bee
  • Wedding: June 2011

@bells:

it’s def a compliment…but it would totally piss me off too! I have a friend who started sniffing aroud the hall we are using which is a place no one has been to and its an hour from our twon. I snuffed that one out by telling her they had a guest minimum. I don’t know if i’d share much more with her. But yes, it’s a high compliment that she wants her wedding to rock as much as yours!

Post # 16
Member
536 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: December 2010

I’ve learned the best people to share my wedding ideas with our my co-workers.  They aren’t apart of my personal life and will not be attending my wedding.  They are the perfect people to share my wedding thoughts and get ideas from.

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