Is it bad for me to be picky about the location of my proposal?

posted 1 year ago in Proposals
Post # 2
Member
3736 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: November 2014

I’d say you’re teetering on being high maintenance. It’s one thing to request a public or private proposal but being so specific that you want it out of state or some over the top location is a bit much. You’ll have an entire wedding to plan. Let him have this one. 

Post # 3
Member
323 posts
Helper bee

Yes, you are being high maintenance. 

The location should be the last thing that matters. You are about to embark on the journey of marriage with this man & this is what you are focusing on?

Let him propose where he wants and enjoy the moment regardless. Fairytales are just that.

Post # 4
Member
1451 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: June 2018

Super high maintenance.

Post # 5
Member
9615 posts
Buzzing Beekeeper
  • Wedding: August 2016

If you are going to be so picky then you should propose to him, otherwise I think you really need to let it go. Not to be harsh but your post sounds really shallow. 

Post # 6
Member
11970 posts
Sugar Beekeeper

“Am I being high maintenance here?” 

Yes. If you have such a detailed image of how it should be done, then you ought to be the one proposing. That said, if you are openly discussing the logistics of a proposal then essentially you have already agreed to be married. By any traditional definition you are already engaged. 

Post # 7
Member
300 posts
Helper bee

Yes, this is over the top.

You can focus on having an awesome bachelorette or even wedding in another state if you want. I agree with above responses that giving a guideline about public vs private proposals is pretty much as far as you can go with instructions. Leave it up to him. If he was thinking of doing it in Miami anyways then it seeems like he is trying to be creative, which is great. Honestly, my best friend’s boyfriend proposed in a parking lot and it’s the cutest story I ever heard. He had a big plan and just could NOT WAIT out of the parking lot and did it there. I think the spontaneity of that story is cuter than any of these grand proposals in Europe, etc where it’s been overly planned. Personal taste I guess.

Post # 8
Member
955 posts
Busy bee

Echoing high maintenance. 

Also, trust me… Miami isn’t THAT cool.  If you must be out of your state, then talk to him in advance about planning a romantic weekend getaway.  It would only take a few hours to drive out of your state, and then you could both get what you want out of the weekend if you plan it in advance.  

I got proposed to on a dock at sunset, over a man-made lake, in misty rain, with a dead car battery.  Trust me, the location doesn’t matter as much as you’d think.  I’d recommend letting your boyfriend decide and come up with a proposal that will surprise you.  

Post # 9
Member
6800 posts
Busy Beekeeper
  • Wedding: April 2016

Yes you are being high maintenance. I agree with hikingbride :  If you’re going to be this picky you should be the one proposing. Don’t micromanage your own proposal. Wherever it happens it will be special.

One of my best friends got engaged in Paris right in front of the Eiffel Tower. A couple months later my husband proposed to me in a park, just the two of us, sitting on a bench swing. It was wonderful and I wouldn’t change it for the world! The place doesn’t matter. What matters is the decision to spend the rest of your lives together. 

Post # 11
Member
2570 posts
Sugar bee

Yes, you are being high maintenance.  

Post # 12
Member
1158 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: October 2016

Yes, you’re being too picky and high maintenance about this. Let it happen wherever he plans and enjoy the moment and the words you share with each other, not what your preconceived notions of how it “should” be, or comparing it to other couples’ proposal locations. 

Post # 13
Member
7663 posts
Bumble Beekeeper

justpeachy505 :  Yup, this is high maintenance territory. Personally I don’t see why you wouldn’t want to be proposed to someplace you’ll get to see again. My husband proposed on the front porch of our house – I get to stop and relive the moment any time I choose and it’s lovely. 

Post # 14
Member
9729 posts
Buzzing Beekeeper
  • Wedding: City, State

Not only does he have to buy you a ring and pledge the rest of his life to you but homeboy also has to arrange an out of state trip to do so?

Girl. Let me link you to some proposal stories we’ve had posted here and then maybe you’ll be fine with the state capital as long as he has pants and underwear on. 

Post # 15
Member
7851 posts
Bumble Beekeeper

Bee….no, just no. Your proposal is not going to be “second best” even if it happens at home while watching Netflix. I’m sorry to be blunt, but this is a really really immature mindset that you have. Please get your priorities straight! The proposal is about you and your partner making a lifelong commitment to one another – that’s it. It’s not a competition to see whose proposal happens in the most exotic location with the most over-the-top props. 

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