Is it bad for me to be picky about the location of my proposal?

posted 1 year ago in Proposals
Post # 61
453 posts
Helper bee

crazychickenlady :  I feel you!

Not ’till you get your pants back on, sister.  There will be no naked feeling of anyone.  This is not that kind of board.  🙂

Post # 63
172 posts
Blushing bee

While other people already touched on whether you think you are high maintenence or not, I just wanted you to know, I got proposed to in bed at the end of a work day with not much fanfare and I was over the moon happy. When I told my friend how it happened, her response was “Wow! That is SO you guys.” Which it really was 🙂 I was not expecting a proposal, nor did I have any hint of one coming, but I was so happy that he even was thinking about proposing, and there IS something to be said for the element of surprise. 

Also, on a side note, why would you not go on a trip alone with your parents just because your parents wouldn’t like it? From what you said, you both are in the last year of university, which I am assuming means you both are at least in your early 20’s. You and your boyfriend are adults, your parents will get over themselves, especially if you are going to get engaged. And if you are planning on getting married, you are adult enough to go on a trip with your boyfriend alone.

Post # 64
683 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: September 2017

Yeah, this sounds super high maintenance. Why don’t you just plan everything out and hand him a script? Or better yet, propose to him yourself! That way you get your “perfect” proposal and he doesn’t have to deal with the extra pressure. 

Post # 65
4568 posts
Honey bee
  • Wedding: June 2010

High maintenance as f#ck OP. Sorry. 

Post # 66
6097 posts
Bee Keeper
  • Wedding: September 2016

A couple things in your post make you sound like you might not yet be ready to get engaged or married, OP- your request DOES sound extremely high maintenance and also your concern for your parents thoughts about you traveling with someone you (hopefully) will be marrying. Those both speak to a lack of maturity in this situation and make me think HOW you are proposed to is the least of your concerns here.

Post # 67
1081 posts
Bumble bee

You are being pretty high maitenance.

Post # 68
3837 posts
Honey bee
  • Wedding: April 2017

Yep. You can’t plan your own surprise. Either let him do his thing or just mutually agree to be engaged. I mean you can expect that he put in a reasonable amount of thought but if you want to control specifics then it becomes a weird pretend-surprise thing, no? And no, your proposal won’t be second-best because it wasn’t overseas! That’s silly. Makes it sound like you just want the exotic location to impress people…

Post # 70
108 posts
Blushing bee
  • Wedding: May 2019

justpeachy505 :  this is high maintenance. You cannot control how a man proposes and why would you want to? He could have the most romantic thing planned and end up proposing to you when it felt like the perfect time. Just because it wasn’t somewhere you think worthy of a good enough place is very high school. If this is what you’re concerned about (the image of being proposed to) then you should wait a couple more years to develop your relationship. This should honestly be the last thing on your mind. 

Post # 71
291 posts
Helper bee

You sound really controlling and not mature enough for marriage. 

Post # 73
1230 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: August 2018 - -

Mm . . . You are part of why some men wait months to plan a suuuper speeecial proposal while their significant others are in agonizing frustration, feeling like a proposal won’t ever happen.

Post # 74
317 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: January 2018

My Husband proposed to me on his balcony, he had set up a dinner table and chased everyone away for the night. It was super intimate and special to me. 

When my SIL’s mom asked how did he propose and when I told her, she said ‘Oh, well I guess some people like that hey’, because my brother had proposed to my SIL at some high class restaurant and had the singer dedicate a song to her etc. 

Our proposal was perfect for US. 

That being said, yes, you are being high maintenance. 

Post # 75
760 posts
Busy bee


Well, now that you already brought this to his attention that you want to create memories in other states as well, leave it to him to follow through. You don’t have to control the proposal to that level.

I am sure wherever he does it, he will have a reason for doing it that way after knowing what you want. Maybe he just said that the Miami thing won’t work out just to throw you off his scent. Hehe! laughing

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