Is it cold feet?

posted 3 years ago in Engagement
Post # 2
Member
973 posts
Busy bee

It sounds like agreeing to such a big commitment made you reevaluate your relationship, and inner you decided he is not “the one”. No sense in punishing him for that any longer if you don’t think your feelings will change. If you want to give it one last go I’d try going on a weekend getaway to see if you can rekindle something. But it doesn’t bode well for the long term to me 

Post # 3
Hostess
8486 posts
Bumble Beekeeper
  • Wedding: Dorset, UK

missjitters :  Have you talked to him at all? He must be very confused if you have just got engaged. Did you really ever want to get engaged?

Post # 4
Member
7816 posts
Bumble Beekeeper

Getting engaged is a strange time. It’s something you anticipate for so long, but when it really happens, a lot of couples have a “holy shit this is FOREVER ahhh” moment. When my fiance and I got engaged, we were really happy in that moment, but then I went through this weird phase of feeling kind of numb for a few days. I wasn’t having cold feet or anything….I just felt detached, which I think was my head’s way of processing everything. After a week or so things went back to normal and things have been great ever since.

I would definitely let the dust settle before making any drastic moves. I’m not saying to ignore your feelings cause they could very well turn out to be more than just a fleeting reaction to the big moment you just went through…but they also might not.

Post # 5
Member
12089 posts
Sugar Beekeeper

I don’t see how any of us, without knowing either of you, how long you’ve been together, the nature of your previous relationship or  the kind of things that are bothering you now can begin to answer this question. But I would not marry someone anytime soon if you are having doubts and fighting all the time, no matter whose fault it is or what the reason. 

Post # 6
Member
369 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: January 2016

Do you happen to be engaged to someone on here named coldddfeet??  How long have you been engaged?

Post # 7
Member
1254 posts
Bumble bee

missjitters :  

I second what PP said, it’s very hard for any of us to tell you what the cause of you’re feelings are without knowing either one of you. Not to mention we have no idea how you’re relationship is and how you are both individually and as a couple.

However, with that being said. You do have the OH SHIT moment, when you get engaged…but not to that extent.

Post # 8
Member
63 posts
Worker bee
  • Wedding: April 2018

I do think the inner you as PP put it, the gut-you that doesn’t have a voice but can make you feel is realizing that this is a lifetime commitment. What you need to decide is whether you’ll feel this way with any one or is it just with him. If any one, you may not be ready for commitment. If just him, inner you doesn’t want to commit to HIM

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