Is it Enough Sex? & Orgasms/Lack Of

posted 7 years ago in Intimacy
Post # 17
Member
1664 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: September 2012

@impatiently_buzzing:  If your lady bits feel like its getting irritated try using some lube. When Darling Husband and I have a particularly long session I tend to get irritated too, Darling Husband breaks out the lube and everything is right as rain.

Post # 18
Member
2691 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: October 2015

I know you said you don’t like masturbating, but if you don’t know how to get yourself off, you can’t expect to be able to show someone else how to.

Beyond that, I can tell you that (TMI alert) I have only ever gotten off from intercourse once. Every other time, my Fiance has to manually stimulate me to get me off. Sometimes it can take up to fifteen minutes, so maybe you guys aren’t giving it enough time? Or he’s not spending enough time getting you turned on. The longer you have to wait for what you want, the better it feels when you get it which usually means easier orgasms.

Post # 20
Member
853 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: June 2012

Without ever masturbating, I really doubt that you’ll get to an orgasm. You have to know what YOU like before you can ever show it to someone else. You also have to know yourself during masturbation/climax – like how to breathe, what muscles to tense or relax, how to hit it just right. Another person cannot show you this about yourself – in my opinion. Please be open to trying things with yourself. Get good and lubed up with some porno or smutty stories and then just play around. Have fun!

Post # 21
Member
390 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: July 2013

How much foreplay do you use? Foreplay aka oral, or manual stimulation is a big thing for me to orgasm. Maybe try more foreplay

Post # 22
Member
1435 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: September 2019 - City, State

@impatiently_buzzing:  Well, my first orgasm was vaginal. I’ll tell you what we did. I liked to be on top. So he would lay on the corner on the bed with his legs on the floor, so I could straddle him and push off the floor, too. And I would bend forward or lean back until I found my g spot. He was so not allowed to move. I had to do it, because any interruption would scare it away.

But the first time it happened, I felt all the swelling and the sneezy feeling. It got really scary and he looked at me like I was the Exorcist. It was insane. 

You gotta make sure he’s not rubbing it too hard though. Some men rub it hard like they are scrubbing a bath tub or something. They need to lighten up. Seriously.

Gosh. I don’t even remember my first clit one. I have to think about that.

You know, there’s a nerve that goes down your right leg to your toes. I believe it controls the orgasm. I say that because after I had a hip operation, my vaginal orgasms disappeared. I tried and tried and I could get a faint one every now and then, but it was too much work, so I gave up.

 

But I know what you mean about the clit getting too irritated. That’s why I say you need to play with it and you need to figure out what pressure, direction, etc. And then you can teach it to him. 

Post # 23
Member
2652 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: July 2012 - Catholic Church

@impatiently_buzzing:  I’ve never had an orgasm either and I always want to have sex (as in as often as he’s able to get it up!). I don’t like masturbating because I find it hurts my clitoris. If you get the vibrator, I’d love to hear if it works for you. Darling Husband feels emasculated whenever he’s reminded in any way that I’ve never had an orgasm. But, we did it in the car while we were staying at my parents’ for Christmas and it was the closest I’ve ever gotten. I often get the urge to pee when we’re having sex though and I have the whole build up, but it never gets past that. It’s honestly a little frustrating.

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