(Closed) Is it horrible to not send a invite to someone who got a save the date?

posted 7 years ago in Etiquette
  • poll: In this case Is it horrible to not send a invite to someone who got a save the date?
    Yes, you sent the save the date : (40 votes)
    40 %
    No, they are CRAZY!!!! : (58 votes)
    59 %
    Other, please explain : (1 votes)
    1 %
  • Post # 3
    Member
    7293 posts
    Busy Beekeeper
    • Wedding: October 2011

    So you don’t want them at your wedding because you fear they may cause a scene?

    Well in general I wouldn’t reccomend not sending one due to ettiquette but if you no longer wish to associate with this couple and you think its going to be a danger, than it could be an option.

    Post # 5
    Member
    89 posts
    Worker bee
    • Wedding: July 2012

    I wouldnt want people like that in my life let alone my wedding. I say no invite, no way. Im sure they’ll understand why. 

    Post # 6
    Member
    2891 posts
    Sugar bee
    • Wedding: July 2013

    I say save yourself the drama and don’t invite them. However if they know where the wedding is to be held they may still show up and be even nastier than ever. The lack of invite may still cause a scene. I don’t know what to say other than not invite them and pray they let it go. I take it you have no plans to continue the friendship in the future?

    Post # 7
    Member
    3692 posts
    Sugar bee
    • Wedding: December 2011

    Given that they behaved so badly at that other wedding, and if I were you I wouldn’t care about hurting their feelings, I’d say don’t invite them.

    Post # 8
    Member
    4150 posts
    Honey bee
    • Wedding: November 1999

    Yeah, in this case, I say forget about etiquette.  If you don’t want that element to be part of your wedding day (which is how I would feel) and have no plans to associate with them again, then no invite. 

    Post # 9
    Member
    7609 posts
    Bumble Beekeeper

    I agree, if you no longer plan to be friends with these people, don’t invite them.

    Post # 10
    Member
    1577 posts
    Bumble bee
    • Wedding: September 2012

    @Juliepants:  one more vote for don’t invite them, if you don’t plan to be friends with them and they’ve been ousted from your social circle.

    Post # 11
    Member
    1014 posts
    Bumble bee
    • Wedding: May 2011

    like some of the PPs mentioned, only skip the invite if you’re planning on cutting them out of your life completely. if you plan to still be friendly to them, you’ll be setting yourself up for even more drama.

    Post # 12
    Member
    441 posts
    Helper bee
    • Wedding: September 2014

    I agree with everyone else, I wouldn’t invite them if you dont want to associate with them anymore.

    Post # 13
    Member
    4755 posts
    Honey bee
    • Wedding: May 2012

    Here’s what I’m doing about the “possibles”.

    Hey bouncer, big bar tender, coodinator, security garud? I have a few people x,y,z those two at table 3 with black hair that might get out of hand, at the first sign of trouble please remove them from the scene.

    Post # 14
    Member
    879 posts
    Busy bee
    • Wedding: November 1999

    I second simplifiedbride’s answer!  Sometimes it’s better to prevent the drama.  If you’re not planning to invite them, I would tell them in person or at least call them (even if it’s been a month) to explain your situation and not have them discover it on their own that they weren’t invited.

    Post # 15
    Member
    3626 posts
    Sugar bee
    • Wedding: September 2012

    If neither you nor your friends have spoken with them in a month and a half, they probably won’t initiate communication again just to ask where their invitation is. I’m sure they are embarrassed and won’t bring it up.

    The topic ‘Is it horrible to not send a invite to someone who got a save the date?’ is closed to new replies.

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