(Closed) Is it in poor taste to have a gift “theme” at a bridal shower?

posted 10 years ago in Parties
Post # 3
1896 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: August 2009 - St. Thomas of Villanova Church & the F.U.E.L. House

I think it’s a cute idea!  Maybe, though, you want to do something different than the wedding "theme."  Does she have a favorite hobby you can frame it around?  Or a meal?  (I hosted a breakfast-themed afternoon bridal shower once for a bride who LURVES morning foods!)

Post # 4
813 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: May 2018

I think its ok to have a themed shower, but just remember that EVERY SINGLE GIFT is going to be the same– probably a china place setting, and maybe the coffee creamer/sugar bowl or the serving plates. Usually, you open the gifts at the shower, and guests might get bored (and it might be a little awkward) if everyone watches her open plate after plate after plate. Usually, the themes are "kitchen" so she gets all sorts of different things that are more exciting to watch her open, or "lingerie" which can also be fun.

Also, you might want to take into consideration the cost of the china. Mine is pretty expensive (over $100 per place setting) and although some guests might spend that on wedding gifts, usually shower gifts are less expensive. 

Post # 5
948 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: May 2018 - Coyaba Resort, Montego Bay

I think a themed shower is fine – A "Stock the Bar" theme to get the couples wine & champagne glasses, martini glasses, swizzles, wine, etc. 

If you know that the bride really wants her china, then it should be fine to have that as the theme.  It doesn’t offer guests any options, really, of what to get her…but again, if she wants it then do it.

Also factor in cost of her china settings!

Post # 7
2640 posts
Sugar bee

I guess I wrote my other response in the wrong thread.  You mentioned the kitchen theme.  That seems fine to me.  There is a lot of variety in the kitchen realm. But having a china theme, doesn’t really seem like a theme to me.  It’s like the bride is just saying "Buy me china, please."  A "kitchen theme" doesn’t come across that way.

Gift giving (showers, weddings) is a way for guests to support the couple and give a heartfelt gift.  Sure some guests don’t know, or want to put thought into a gift.  So for that I think suggestions and registeries are wonderful.  Word of mouth is wonderful here.  But putting it in the invitation, even as a suggestion is going to make guests feel like they have to give that as a gift, even if they don’t want to. (Or they buck the system and feel like a bad guy.)  The purpose of a shower isn’t for a person to say, "Yeah it’s my gift grab.  Just get me this."

I know you’re trying to do what’s best for the bride based on what she said to you.  But I think word of mouth is better for this situation.  But I’m sure it will be nice however you do it.

Post # 8
2324 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: October 2018

You could make it a Dinner Party theme or something along those lines…"Let’s get XXXX ready to throw her first dinner party"? I think people would think china then. You would also end up getting cookbooks, silverware, etc. but probably a fair amount of china. 

Post # 9
752 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: October 2016

I just posted on your other thread, but I want to reiterate that I think a themed shower is fine, but specifically requesting that guests only shop from her china registry is a little specific. You could have a shower where the theme is expressly stated, then circulate that the bride is very excited about her china by word of mouth. I think some guests might see requesting that they bring china as a little limiting.

Good luck in planning, and I’m sure it will be great whatever you do! 

Post # 11
168 posts
Blushing bee
  • Wedding: May 2009

I second KateMW’s idea. I think the china theme is just a little too specific. In my family, the men getting married get their own shower – a tool shower. You add tools to your registry so that all the men in the family know what kind of tools the guy wants, and then they throw the shower in someone’s garage, surrounded by tools and beer. Themed showers like this are supposed to be fun, and, like another poster said, watching someone open dish after dish might get a little boring.

Post # 12
2022 posts
Buzzing bee

I have been to a lingerie shower which was pretty fun.  I think themes are OK but agree that china is on the pricier side and might be difficult for guests to swing.  I think the dinner party theme is a fabulous idea!

Post # 13
2030 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: December 1969

I just wanted to add that I adore the Dinner Party theme suggested by KateMW! If I were invited to that sort of shower I would be excited to choose a gift and attend. I think she’ll get a lot of china this way too.

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