(Closed) Is it lame or outdated to have your BM's all wear the same dress? (pics)

posted 4 years ago in Bridesmaids
Post # 31
154 posts
Blushing bee
  • Wedding: December 2017

I think the floral dress you picked is very pretty! So if your BM’s don’t mind, then go ahead and do whatever you want. Don’t worry about being outdated or anything.

If you are just generally asking…then yes. I do think having the uniform bridesmaids is very quickly becoming a thig of the past. It is now not only okay, but fashionable to wear black to a wedding, wear two piece gowns, and wear a non-white wedding dress. Times are changing, and the cookie-cutter bridesmaid look is definitely phasing out. If you are interested in being a fashion forward bride, I would definitely go with the mismatched gowns you have picked out. They look great together. 

Personally I think (fashionable or not) mismatched gowns tend to photograph better together. It makes for more natural looking and visually interesting pictures.

Well done! I think you have picked two great looks!

Post # 32
9606 posts
Buzzing Beekeeper
  • Wedding: July 2016

I prefer the matching set.

Post # 33
2595 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: July 2015

I don’t consider it outdated to have the same dress but I think it’s hard to suit different body shapes with one. I prefer your mixed set in this case.

Post # 34
11970 posts
Sugar Beekeeper


“Brides, however, have become convinced that ….they should have dictatorial powers over the wardrobes of the wedding party, without regard to the tastes or budgets of those concerned. Miss Manners has not met with much success in attempting to persuade them that the bridesmaids need not look like a chorus line.”

Post # 35
732 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: November 2016


weddingmaven:  Oh man, Miss Manners in the last few years is full of snark.  I love her so much.


To the OP, I think either will work.  If they’re truly comfy with anything I like the ones that are the same but that’s just because I think it’s the nicest of the 3 dresses you’ve chosen. But mine are probably going to wear different dresses so I think in the end all that matters is that they’re happy, and that you’re happy.

Post # 36
1709 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: November 2016 - Garden

If you like to have symmetry and order for the attire I think the same dress will do great. But if you like that spunky look for your Bridesmaid or Best Man I say let them pick similar dress colors but their own style 😀 

I was actually thinking that for my Bridesmaid or Best Man but it’s hard to decide first off because if I were to pick for my Bridesmaid or Best Man I don’t want them to feel insecure or offended in any way, or just bring chaos all together if they regret the look, so the symmetrical dresses are the best choice. In my opinion. 

Post # 37
3171 posts
Sugar bee

I think it’s neither outdated nor preferred. Do whatever works for you and your girls. I liked the mismatched set you posted, you have a great eye 

Post # 38
127 posts
Blushing bee

I think it’s outdated .

 The mismatched dresses look beautiful together.

  • This reply was modified 3 years, 7 months ago by  jonescivil.
Post # 39
13582 posts
Honey Beekeeper
  • Wedding: November 1999

It’s totally a preference thing.  I personally hate the mix-matched look and think it generally is not pulled off well.  Some people can do it successfully, but usually, I think it looks sloppy.  But that’s just my preference.  You pick whatever dress or dresses you like, and that’s what you do.


Post # 40
461 posts
Helper bee

aussiemum1248:  I totally agree with this. It’s the main reason I wouldn’t do it for my own wedding.

I’m not a matchy matchy person and do love how mix n match bridesmaids can look when done right but I have a feeling it’s gonna look pretty outdated soon.

Post # 41
162 posts
Blushing bee
  • Wedding: January 2016 - The Great Southern Club

i don’t find it lame but very boring. i don’t judge people if they choose to have matching dresses though. i did mismatch and it turned out beautiful. the tuxes didn’t even match the bridesmaids, they wore silver and black and my BMs wore red! i wanted it to look more like a fancy event than a wedding…if that makes sense LOL

the dress you chose is very pretty though, and you should do what you want to do! it is your special day so make it the way you want.

Post # 42
104 posts
Blushing bee
  • Wedding: Laurel Hall

I personally was in a wedding where we were able to wear our own style out of like 3 but the same color. I thought that was fine, but I wanted to choose 1 style but found out I’d be the only one wearing that style so I had to wear a different one. (My choice, not the bride’s). I just didn’t want to stand out THAT much. Overall, I think everyone had a style they liked. 

FWIW my bridesmaids will be wearing the same dress, same style, same color. It is easier to manage and it looked lovely with everyone’s shapes. I think it will look more cohesive and more the “look” I am going for. I have seen some beautiful wedding photos where the girls are all wearing different dresses/designers and I think it looks amazing. 

Post # 43
24 posts

PinkPearls:  personally I like them all in the same dress, and all of the weddings I’ve been to have the same dresses.

Post # 44
359 posts
Helper bee

PinkPearls:  I love the matching dresses! Where did you find them? 

Post # 45
527 posts
Busy bee

I don’t think it’s outdated per se to have them wear the same dress, but I do think it is a good idea to do different dresses of the same color if your girls have different body types. It can be hard to find one that complements them all. 

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