Post # 47
I don’t really consider it un-romantic, it is something you will be wearing for the rest of your life- so it is great to get what you want. However, we aren’t known to be super romantic… more on the practical side anyway. My husband surprised me with a “stand in” $10 Target ring when he proposed out of the blue.
Afterwards he gave me a budget range, had me work with a jeweler that I liked since he knows I am very picky about jewelry (poor, poor man!) and then once it was designed, he took over with the jeweler and surprised me when it came in. It was great having a ring on while we waited for the new one to come in.
Post # 48
Jenny, I see what you’re saying, I guess a lot of people would feel this way, which is why some people don’t go ring shopping together.
I don’t really think though that it’s why there are so many obsessed waiting bees LOL… I mean yes, it makes it hard knowing the ring has been purchased, but even still, whether you pick a ring together or not, chances are you know the timeline, and are just dying to start planning your wedding. Most couples have pretty open communication, and while it’s an amazing fairy tale dream to be totally surprised with a proposal out of the blue, it usually doesn’t happen that way anymore. Chances are you’ve talked about marriage and have a certain timeline in your heads, so you can expect a proposal within X amount of time. So me personally, I’d be going crazy obsessed regardless of if I picked the ring or not LOL, but at least worrying about if I liked the ring is off the list.
I really like how you expressed your opinion though, without forcing it on others, yet I can still see where you’re coming from. I wish most threads would be like this lol!
Post # 49
Post # 50
Jenny, I would tend to agree that a lot of waiting board bees have already helped their Fiance shop for a ring and are waiting on the surprise proposal. I was a waiting bee for a few months and this was the case for me. We were planning the wedding but not officially engaged yet. Was it hard sometimes to not be officially engaged? Sure. Would I change any of it? No! Waiting was frustrating but also fun and romantic in its own way, so I wouldn’t say that there’s anything bad about it!
And of course, there are waiting bees that have no idea if they are going to get a proposal any time soon or what their ring will be! We’re a diverse hive 🙂
Post # 51
I didn’t mean to sound bitchy guys 🙂 It’s just to me that ruins the whole surprise. My proposal was a TOTAL surprise and I wouldn’t have liked it any other way. Didn’t mean to offend any waiting bees. Although I do feel that obsesssing over every little comment the SO makes and jumping to conclusions as to when he is going to pop the question and looking at bank statements is a little over the top for me. But I love all the bees and know we are all here basically for the same reason 🙂
Post # 52
I don’t really think its unromantic to go looking together and then he makes the final decision. My Fiance thought ANY involvement on my part made it less romantic which I tend to disagree with. And during the process of looking he got my exact ring size which he didn’t know and lucky thing because I thought it was bigger. He also realized that I wasn’t into super big diamond rings. He will get the final say on the shape and design of the ring, but he also knows what to steer clear of. He also admitted that it was a bit romantic doing some of this together.
Romance is an individual thing I guess. When my Fiance proposed it was at a very unexpected moment and it was very heartfelt and honest. He was bummed because he didn’t have the ring at the time which was how he wanted to do it, but we were home having a nice evening together and it was very spontaneous. I loved it and we both got very emotional. It was only after that we began on our search for the ring and he wanted to select it on his own thinking it would take away from it if he didn’t do it by himself.
Post # 53
Because it turned out well, I can say it was even more romantic that Fiance picked it out all by himself (I really didn’t even know it was coming!) BUT – that’s because it turned out well!! It would be a lot less romantic if the surprise was disappointing. Sure it’s supposed to be the thought that counts, but every girl has an opinion of what they find pretty, and rather than have to navigate those awkard conversations about whther to excchange or try to learn to love something that’s not “you”, I see no problem with chosing it together.
As much as I adore my ering, it was actually my 2nd choice setting. If we’d have gone together, I would have prolly picked the exact same thing but micro-pave instead of knife-edge plain metal. Fortunately I do still love the one I have!!