(Closed) Is it normal for a guy to not think much about wedding stuff?

posted 3 years ago in Relationships
Post # 2
Member
5365 posts
Bee Keeper
  • Wedding: May 2016

I think so. My husband gave zero fucks about the wedding. 

Post # 3
Member
654 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: September 2016

lizabeth6786 :  The only aspect of the wedding my husband helped with was chosing the cake flavors as well as food. He helped with logistics like timeline. The day before he was helpful with decorating and carrying stuff That is about it! I did everything else!

ksn1219 :  LOL same with mine! 🙂

Post # 4
Member
49 posts
Newbee

Maybe that is just the part of the wedding he is not concerned?  Maybe give him a deadline on when you guys should finalized the guest list?  

Post # 5
Member
9224 posts
Buzzing Beekeeper
  • Wedding: October 2013

my husband only wanted to be involved with food and music. everything I made the decision myself about.

Post # 6
Member
510 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: April 2018

my fiance is the same way.  you have loads of time yet before you need to finanlize your headcount…your wedding isn’t untol 2019, correct?  mine isn’t until 2018 – my fiance (this is his 2nd time) won’t start getting involved until it gets closer, so he says…but, i really haven’t let that stop me…i’ve already diy’ed everything that needs to be done (except my cake stand) and secured all of my venures (except my baker & bridesmaids gowns/grooms tuxs).

a co-worker friend of mine (a guy who recently got married last year, explained to me that men can’t get excited until they are in the ‘here and now’ moment…just like they procrastinate for christmas, so to they will procrastinate for other large events in their lives.

Post # 7
Member
1115 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: September 2017 - Mississauga Convention Centre

So far my fiancee is very concerned and involved in planning our wedding. The only thing he wasnt involved in was my dress and my accessories. Everything else he has been involved with.

Post # 8
Member
1253 posts
Bumble bee

If he actually responded “She won’t get an invite to YOUR wedding” then I’d say that’s a red flag because he’s basically saying it’s only you’re day.  

When it comes to him not caring you really have to provide us with some background information this post isn’t enough to give you advice.

No it’s not normal for him to AVOID wedding conversations. However, it depends on you’re relationship as a whole.

My husband was really involved in wedding planning, and he spoke about it a lot. He was just really slow getting things done.

Post # 9
Member
1011 posts
Bumble bee

You say that you’ve talked about being married – are you engaged? If he hasn’t formally proposed, maybe he just doesn’t think of a wedding as an actual thing yet? My guy and I will be negaged next year, and he doesn’t really think about a wedding yet. Once we’re formally engaged and it becomes a “real thing” he’ll have opinions.

Post # 10
Member
3452 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: September 2017 - Poppy Ridge Golf Course

All Fiance wants to know is when something needs to be paid and what time he has to show up. He created his half of the guest list but treated it like the most hated chore ever. Sometimes I have zero f*cks to give myself when it comes to planning so I’ve learned to let it go. :p He’s said he’s excited to get married but isn’t into the details at all.

Post # 11
Member
4823 posts
Honey bee
  • Wedding: June 2014

lizabeth6786 :   Are you engaged yet?  

If your wedding date is actually June 2019 it seems reasonable not to have thought about it much.  

Post # 12
Member
7418 posts
Busy Beekeeper
  • Wedding: October 2014

Wedding =\= marriage.

There is a big difference between “talking about being married” and actually planning a wedding.

You can be perfectly married without a big wedding. All it takes is a marriage license and a courthouse. 

One’s level of enthusiasm for wedding planning duties does not correlate to one’s level of love for their future spouse. 

If it truly pisses you off that your SO hasn’t planned out the wedding day details and you’re not even engaged yet, I’d suggest staying the heck away from Pintrest until after you’ve gotten engaged, planned the wedding, and said the vows. 

Post # 13
Member
454 posts
Helper bee

My husband was just as invested as I was, but not as concerned with the details. I did most of the research and planning and presented him with a few ‘options’ and we made the final decision like that. He did have his own tasks that he was in charge of, too.

If he really had intended to leave everything up to me to worry about, I wouldn’t have married him haha. We’re a team, we do things together, no matter how unpleasant!

Post # 14
Member
10035 posts
Sugar Beekeeper
  • Wedding: City, State

Are you actually engaged?

Or is this just talk about the future.

 

Post # 15
Member
3064 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: September 2014

ksn1219 :  hahaha yup sounds about right. My Darling Husband was the same way. I dont even think he knew the colors until the day of. 

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