Is it ok for grandma to call the babysitter?

posted 2 years ago in Married Life
Post # 16
Member
1034 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: May 2013

Based on this and your last thread, you need to set boundaries and your Mother-In-Law needs a hobby. None of what you describe is typical grandparent behavior and if you don’t put your foot down soon, this is how it’s going to be. Your husband needs to intervene on your behalf and tell her to back off. Maybe it would help if you had a set day every week when she can FaceTime. That way she has that to look forward to and doesn’t have to obsess. I can tell you this would be a big problem in my marriage if my husband didn’t have the balls to handle his mother and put my sanity first.

Post # 17
Member
6441 posts
Bee Keeper

Buck up and tell Mother-In-Law to back the fuck off. Why aren’t you doing this???

Post # 18
Member
13589 posts
Honey Beekeeper
  • Wedding: November 1999

Yeah, no, not okay.  You shouldn’t pass out your sitter’s phone number (or anyone’s, for that matter) just willy-nilly.  There’s no reason your Mother-In-Law needs it.  If I were your sitter, I’d be super pissed.  Your Darling Husband needs to say something to his mother and set up boundaries.

Post # 19
Member
527 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: June 2017

I read your last thread – tell your Mother-In-Law to get lost.

Or better yet, your husband should be telling her to back off.

Post # 20
Member
2333 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: January 2015

Tell your husband to talk to his damn Mom already 

Post # 21
Member
141 posts
Blushing bee

If I were babysitting your child and this overbearing woman somehow started calling me asking to FaceTime the baby, I’d quit ASAP. She needs to chill the eff out.

Post # 22
Member
1149 posts
Bumble bee

zanyapple :  Not even you want to deal with your crazy Mother-In-Law. What makes you think it’s appropriate to unburden yourself onto your sitter? Do not give your sitter’s number to Mother-In-Law. That is NOT appropriate.

Post # 23
Member
11651 posts
Sugar Beekeeper
  • Wedding: June 2015

Next thing you know she’s gonna ask to FaceTime the babysitter while she’s getting a transvaginal ultrasound. 

… Sorry but I’m not over your last thread, yet. Still traumatized by that. 

Do not even respond to these demands anymore. This is beyond ridiculous. 

Post # 24
Member
178 posts
Blushing bee

How about asking the sitter if it is okay instead of making a problem where none exists yet? Why decide it over his/her head? People can talk for themselves. It’s different if YOU don’t want your husband’s mom to talk to the sitter, but if you’re only concern is, that the sitter may quit, talk to her/him.

Make it very clear that you fully understand if the sitter isn’t comfortable with this, but if she/he is, why not? 

Post # 25
Member
1621 posts
Bumble bee

aventurin :  There IS a problem. Read the background first. The HUSBAND doesn’t even want to deal with his mom.

Post # 26
Member
2705 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: May 2015 - St Peter\'s Church, East Maitland, and Bella Vista, Newcastle

Fuuuuuck no.  You have a batshit crazy Mother-In-Law – I reiterate my advice from your earlier thread, get over to DWIL Nation now! And block her on your phone and all social media so you aren’t driven crazy by her.

Post # 27
Member
6441 posts
Bee Keeper
  • Wedding: February 1997

Yeah, I guess after reading your first thread and the question posed in this one… if even YOU don’t want to deal with your Mother-In-Law, what makes you think the sitter will be okay with it? Why are you even pondering the question instead of shutting that sh*t down immediately? It doesn’t matter if anyone else is okay with this or not; YOU are not okay with it, so YOU (or DH) need to deal with it now. 

Post # 28
Member
178 posts
Blushing bee

katebluestone :  Yeah, I’m capable of reading, thanks. Still don’t get why you can’t just simply ask the babysitter – if op’s hubby clearly doesn’t want this at all, then the question itself has no point. I just tried to get around that problem. 

Post # 29
Member
1894 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: October 2017

zanyapple :  If it were me, and I was the babysitter, I would be creeped out, and not want to work for your family again.

Your husband needs to set out boundaries with his mother. That is the only solution for this. I have not read your other threads, but its time. Your Husband needs to talk to his mom, and make your wishes clear.

Post # 30
Member
532 posts
Busy bee

1. Why would your Mother-In-Law know what times you leave the house?

2. Why in the world would you give a poor babysitter’s number to some crazy woman?

If your husband won’t talk to her, you should. Saying no isn’t that hard.

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