(Closed) Is it ok to give used baby items as a gift?

posted 3 years ago in Babies
  • poll: So...
    Yes, giving used items is OKAY! : (52 votes)
    38 %
    No, giving used items is TACKY! : (71 votes)
    51 %
    OTHER : (15 votes)
    11 %
  • Post # 31
    41 posts
    • Wedding: June 2014

    Looks like I’m in the minority, but I’m actually hoping for mostly used baby items at my shower. We’re trying to be sustainable, and it seems to be so much of a waste for friends to buy all new items that will be utilized for such a short time. On my Babylist I’ve specified “pre-loved items welcome”. I’m basically open to everything used except a carseat and pacifiers!

    Of course, as other posters have said, it depends on your sister and what she’d like. I definitely understand that my preferences wouldn’t float most peoples’ boats!

    Post # 32
    1888 posts
    Buzzing bee

    I think it really depends on the person, but in general, gifts should be new items. I’m a big thrifter, but I don’t know if I’d love someone else buying me secondhand clothing– I like being able to gage the cleanliness of the store for myself. Maybe mention to her that there are a lot of inexpensive books and baby clothing at X thrift store, so she can choose for herself?

    Post # 33
    480 posts
    Helper bee

    sfspringbride :  You’re not alone. I’m also an advocate of sustainability, especially in the ever-increasing throw-away society we’ve come to take for granted. It also stymies me why gently-used items as a shower gift (vs. being a non-shower gift) should be considered a major faux pas. The OP did say she was going to ensure that everything was thoroughly cleaned before gifting. I guess I’m different too.

    Post # 34
    9578 posts
    Buzzing Beekeeper
    • Wedding: July 2016

    i think its fine after the shower.

    Post # 35
    523 posts
    Busy bee

    I’m surprised so many people won’t have anything used for their child!! 

    My nieces cot came from a second hand shop, it was literally in new condition, not a mark on it. My sister gave it a wash down (more for her piece of mind, as I said it was impeccable), bought a new mattress  and sheets and viola she literally saved over a thousand dollars. 

    Post # 36
    3169 posts
    Sugar bee

    The best baby shower I went to was a beautiful picnic at a park overlooking a bay where the mum to be asked specifically for recycled items. Personally I think giving second hand items is perfectly fine as I don’t know how living sustainably and not buying more “stuff”, often made in sweatshops, could be seen as tacky

    I usually give gifts for the Mumma at showers anyway – a voucher for a cut and blow dry, massage voucher, fancy champagne or pyjamas, so i might gift something like that alongside it. Bear in mind showers are a bit more down to earth where I am. We don’t have registries and gifts are usually smallish tokens 

    Post # 37
    9097 posts
    Buzzing Beekeeper
    • Wedding: December 2012

    I am thrilled to get used items. I would not have cared if anyone gave me used items at the baby shower. I don’t see why the baby shower is sacred and cannot be “tainted” by used items.


    Edit: 95% of my daughter’s clothing are used. They were used by my best friend, who purchased them used as well. It would be hard for you to find something in her closet that is new.

    The only used product I would straight up refuse is a car seat, just because it’s a huge safety risk.

    Post # 38
    4533 posts
    Honey bee
    • Wedding: November 1999

    mrshmc1204 :  I am not a fan of used items if I am unsure of their origin…stuff from family and friends is OK with me though. Second hand kids stuff from a thrift store given as a gift sounds a bit odd to me. If you are questioning it you probably already know what your sister will think. (If not ask her)

    Get her the new gift for the shower, offer to babysit and give her a few meals to put in her freezer ready for the few weeks after the baby is born when she won’t be up to preping a meal. She will most probably get heaps of clothes and books….stuff like prepared meals and babysitting are things you appreciate loads in the first few months!!

    Post # 39
    575 posts
    Busy bee

    Used books are ok. Used baby clothes: depends, but for a newborn, I would say mostly no. You see, in the first months of baby’s existence bodily liquids spill everywhere. Personally, I would not want that for my child. I donated lots and lots of baby things to the local red cross after my lo outgrew them, but I tossed away almost everything (especially onesies and pyjamas) she wore in the first three months of her life.

    Post # 40
    13686 posts
    Honey Beekeeper
    • Wedding: November 1999

    I would definitely ask her.  I would not be okay with this at all, but that’s just me. 

    Post # 41
    4231 posts
    Honey bee
    • Wedding: September 2015 - Hotel Ballroom

    Don’t get me wrong, I have no problem with thrift shops and hand me downs. My SIL has already given me a bunch of my niece’s old stuff and I am thrilled to have it.

    But not for a shower. I like the idea of offering to take her thrifting. It would be a fun sisters activity!

    Post # 42
    287 posts
    Helper bee
    • Wedding: September 2013

    I’d run it by her. I don’t like the idea of used items for our daughter so we bought everything new but it’s a very personal preference.

    Post # 43
    3114 posts
    Sugar bee
    • Wedding: March 2016 - Surfer\'s Beach, Grand Cayman

    Ask her first. We don’t buy used at all, Darling Husband had bed bugs many years ago in an apartment building and it kind of scarred him for life, so we don’t take any risks. Used items from a trusted person we know would be different but not from a thrift shop and especially not books (clothes you can wash and dry at least to kill bugs). 

    Post # 44
    1117 posts
    Bumble bee

    Just ask her. I don’t mind used items but I like to check for recalls, etc and I prefer they come from people I know. I would never accept a random used carseat or crib though–unless I knew the person and the history. 

    Post # 45
    3 posts

    MrsBuesleBee :  

    some people just don’t like used items. There is nothing prissy about it it is a personal preference 

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