(Closed) is it ok to have 3 maids of honor?

posted 10 years ago in Bridesmaids
  • poll: Is it ok to have 3 maids of honor?
    yes : (43 votes)
    56 %
    no : (34 votes)
    44 %
  • Post # 17
    412 posts
    Helper bee
    • Wedding: July 2014

    @abbie017:  That would be my suggestion too.

    But I think at the end of the day one of them will still have to be in charge somehow?  Unless the bride need none of the parties / planning help.

    Post # 18
    831 posts
    Busy bee
    • Wedding: September 2012

    If they decide to plan pre-wedding parties, they can do so as a team.  I doubt that her three sisters will ‘not’ throw a party simply because OP didn’t ask someone to be Maid/Matron of Honor.

    Post # 19
    26 posts
    • Wedding: September 2012

    will you be having any other bridesmaids? or will it just be the 3 of them?

    Post # 20
    401 posts
    Helper bee
    • Wedding: January 2013

    I think it’s just fine..it’s your wedding so do what makes you happy and your life easiest 🙂

    Post # 21
    24 posts
    • Wedding: July 2012

    I’ve got five bridesmaids, all of them very close friends.  When they agreed to stand up with me at FI’s and my wedding, I was thrilled!  But I couldn’t begin to choose among them — they would all deserve the title of Maid/Matron of Honor, in my heart.  The 2 I’d known the longest lived 1000 miles away at the time (they’ve since moved closer, but are still in another state).  Then there’s the one who took the initiative to form a FB group for the bridal party; the other one who dropped everything and offered to come with me on a spur-of-the-moment dress-shopping trip, took pictures, gave feedback, and helped me find the dress; or the one who patiently listened and supported me when Fiance and I had a rough patch, and ultimately helped us through to the other side of it.

    So rather than draw names out of a hat, I sent them all an e-mail saying:  hey, you’re all very dear to me, and anyway, some of the Maid/Matron of Honor duties seem like tasks for a willing volunteer rather than a draftee (like helping me with my dress while I pee!)  So do any of you want the position?  I’d be honored to have any of you as my Maid/Matron of Honor — just let me know if you want it.

    You know what?  They all had the same response:  we don’t need you to name one or two of us Maid/Matron of Honor, we’re happy to divide the traditional duties among ourselves according to who’s more interested/able/etc. with respect to each task — just let us know when you need help, and one or more or all of us will be there as we can.  And one even volunteered specifically to help with dress-wrangling in the bathroom!

    In other words, Abbie’s solution totally worked for us!  Gemstone’s friend’s approach could be a lovely solution, too.

    So I’d advise you to check in honestly with your bridesmaids, or at least the 3 you’re considering for the position — your group of ladies may feel differently than mine did, but they might be cool with all or none of them having the Maid/Matron of Honor title.  After all, they’re all doing us an honor by being our ‘maids, whether or not they’re our Maids of Honor, right?


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