(Closed) is it ok to “hold” a BM position?

posted 8 years ago in Bridesmaids
Post # 3
3709 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: May 2011

I don’t see a problem with it since your wedding isn’t until June of next year. In fact, after reading a number of posts on here that talk about BMs changing/becoming uncooperative 6 to 9  months out, it may be a good idea just to not ask anybody until the date gets a little closer.

Post # 4
7152 posts
Busy Beekeeper
  • Wedding: October 2010

I agree with not asking anyone yet. You have plenty of time.

Post # 6
18641 posts
Honey Beekeeper
  • Wedding: June 2009

I would wait since you do have time before choosing the last one.  The only problem is that the people you meet might be too busy to go to your wedding (I have friends in med school who barely have any time off).

Post # 7
1020 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: January 2011

i think it’s fine to wait, but i wouldn’t count on just automatically finding a BFF in your new city and wanting her to be in your wedding. if you’re getting married next June, that leaves you about 7 months to find someone and become really close with them that you want them to stand up on the altar with you.

i moved cross country 2 years ago, and soon after met my fiance. it’s funny, i also have 6 bridesmaid–3 sisters, 3 friends. i’ve been close to the 3 friends for years, but dirfted away from one of them a little bit (even though we lived in the same city before i moved) BUT after i moved, she was the one who put in the effort to stay friends and keep up our relationship. shes in my wedding, but im not sure when i lived close to her, i would have asked her–it’s strange we are closer now than when i lived near her.

you can also have one less bridesmaid then groomsmen if you don’t feel close enough to anyone else to ask them–thats no big deal!

Post # 8
837 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: October 2010

First, I know you said you want an even bridal party, but please know that it is perfectly fine to NOT have an even bridal party and I would hate for you to choose someone just to be a space filler (both because you don’t want to look back at your pictures and regret it years from now and because more than likely they will know they are a space filler).

With that said, I don’t see a problem “holding” a spot in case you do happen to become good friends with someone, I just personally wouldn’t stick just anyone in a Bridesmaid or Best Man position.

Hope this helps!

Post # 9
5822 posts
Bee Keeper

I think that holding a Bridesmaid or Best Man spot is a smart move.  You’re right, you COULD become really close to someone, and wouldn’t they love a spot in your wedding!  Smart idea!

Post # 10
113 posts
Blushing bee
  • Wedding: April 2010

I agree.  I think you have plenty of time.  Even if you don’t find someone at your new school, like you said one of your other “not as close” friends could step up to the plate also.

The topic ‘is it ok to “hold” a BM position?’ is closed to new replies.

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