(Closed) Is it ok!! Trying to settle this argument between SO and I

posted 6 years ago in Relationships
  • poll: Is it appropriate ???
    Yes! : (62 votes)
    27 %
    No! : (149 votes)
    64 %
    Other. Explain : (21 votes)
    9 %
  • Post # 3
    Member
    9118 posts
    Buzzing Beekeeper
    • Wedding: December 2012

    Yes.

    I call my female friends beautiful.

    I call my male friends handsome.

    I tell them I love them.

    Post # 4
    Member
    1079 posts
    Bumble bee
    • Wedding: June 2013

    @MrsVMT:  I think it depends on how he usually talks to people.  If it’s normal for him to do that, then it’s fine.  My Fiance never talks to other people like that so I would definitely be offended if I saw that he did that.

    Post # 5
    Member
    2576 posts
    Sugar bee
    • Wedding: June 2010

    I would not have a problem with what he wrote.

    Post # 6
    Member
    1830 posts
    Buzzing bee
    • Wedding: January 2013

    @Hyperventilate:  100% agree.

     

    Girl, be confident, he is with you. Until he proves otherwise don’t freak out over the small stuff.

    Post # 7
    Member
    2378 posts
    Buzzing bee
    • Wedding: April 2018

    I voted other.

    I wouldn’t have a problem with him saying, “Happy birthday beautiful!”

    What I WOULD have a problem with is him telling me that he’d wished he had a chance with her before he met me!

    Obviously he didn’t get a chance with her, and if he’s happy in our relationship, he shouldn’t be regretting not having a chance with some other woman, because at this point it shouldn’t matter! And even if he was thinking that, why say it? What could he possibly hope to gain from that?

    Post # 8
    Member
    4352 posts
    Honey bee
    • Wedding: August 2013

    @SimpleGifts:  +1

    That type of language isn’t part of my regular vocabulary so if I said something like that to someone it would be out of the ordinary and I can really only imagine saying things like that while flirting. But for some people thats just how they talk so it would be expected.

    Post # 10
    Member
    879 posts
    Busy bee
    • Wedding: November 1999

    I think he was trying to be polite and complimentary, but since it bothers you and you are working on your relationship… No, he shouldn’t be saying things like that.  As a PP, I have called other males handsome, but it by no means is a threat or reflection on my Fiance. FI also has dated very beautiful girls in the past and I’m not bothered by it since I agree his ex-gfs were very beautiful.  The fact that it bothers you makes it inappropriate, IMO.

    eta: I also agree with rachelmichelle!

    Post # 11
    Member
    1079 posts
    Bumble bee
    • Wedding: June 2013

    @asscherlover:  Exactly.  The only person I ever call handsome other than my Fiance is my grandfather.  Hah!  I call my female friends all kinds of nice things but I never talk to my male friends like that and I think my Fiance would be rightfully upset if I did that all of a sudden.

    Post # 12
    Member
    4047 posts
    Honey bee
    • Wedding: January 2014

    @SimpleGifts:  

    @asscherlover:  

    Yes to this! If he’s a verbally affectionate guy, then it’s totally okay. That’s his language. If he hardly ever says anything like this, then it’s a little inappropriate.

    Post # 13
    Member
    901 posts
    Busy bee

    I’d have a problem with it because clearly the two of you are having problems. He should be watching himself more carefully right now.

    Though, I’d not be terribly happy about my Fiance saying that to another woman at any time.

    Post # 14
    Member
    870 posts
    Busy bee
    • Wedding: June 2013

    @rachelmichelle:  +1.

    I think that him saying he wish he’d had a chance with her is more inappropriate than him saying “Happy birthday, beautiful.”  That is what would bug me.

    That said, I would be a little worried if my Fiance said that to someone, but only because he doesn’t normally talk that way to anyone but me.

    Post # 15
    Member
    1652 posts
    Bumble bee
    • Wedding: July 2011

    No I would be very uncomfortable with that (but then my hubs does not really speak like that to anyone except me, ever) so it would ring alarm bells for me.

    Post # 16
    Member
    9118 posts
    Buzzing Beekeeper
    • Wedding: December 2012

    @MrsVMT: I have no advice for that that you would like. Just because he calls someone else beautiful doesn’t mean he’s popping a boner for them. It’s a figure of speech for most men.

    The topic ‘Is it ok!! Trying to settle this argument between SO and I’ is closed to new replies.

    Find Amazing Vendors