(Closed) Is it okay for parents to do this?

posted 5 years ago in Parenting
  • poll: Do you think that's okay?

    No way! Not even for a minute.

    It depends

    I do it all the time

  • Post # 17
    Member
    289 posts
    Helper bee
    • Wedding: October 2016

    I’m not a parent, but my mom used to let my two sisters and me hang in the car with the keys in the ignition when we were ages 5-13 or something. No harm no foul. Sometimes she would be gone for a half hour to make a return or something lol as long as the A/C was on, we were happy campers!

    Now-a-days, these kids wanna see what happens when they explore pressing the gas pedal and touching all the buttons. 

    Post # 18
    Member
    7803 posts
    Bumble Beekeeper

    View original reply
    MelissainNC:  Not being dramatic. Perhaps cops respond differently in different parts of the country. I know where I live if a cop saw me walk into 7-11 and leave three young children alone in the car I would be on the receiving end of a very public lecture and likely leave with a warning–because I’ve seen it happen. I also once witnessed a woman get arrested at a Toys ‘R Us after someone called the police because she’d left her baby in the car while she ran in to buy diapers. She was crying and begging them to wait for her husband to arrive and not hand the baby over to a social worker. That was pretty real to me. 

    Update based on Hyperventilate’s link: my state is one where it is unlawful to leave a young child unattended in a car. It appears yours is not.

    • This reply was modified 5 years ago by  beethree.
    • This reply was modified 5 years ago by  beethree.
    Post # 20
    Member
    1739 posts
    Bumble bee
    • Wedding: June 2016

    View original reply
    Hyperventilate:  I was just about to post that exact page.  The woman who runs that website is my hero.  In the vast majoirty of those 19 states where it *can* be illegal, the laws specify restrictions on time limits, dangerous conditions, or circumstances such as the car must remain in sight.  

    Bottom line: in the overwhelming vast majoirty of the states (all but 2, I think?), it is okay to leave the kids alone in the car for a few minutes, especially if the car remains in sight, as long as there are no dangerous conditions.   Which is completely consistent with my first post on the subject, and probably also fits the conditions that the OP witnesses.  

    The people who say “it is never okay” or “it is illegal” without clarifying very specific circumstances, are simply wrong.

    Post # 22
    Member
    3460 posts
    Sugar bee
    • Wedding: September 2013

    I don’t think it’s the worst thing in the world, assuming that the parent has taken stock of the situation and finds it a reasonably safe option. However, leaving kids unattended in the car is not a habit I ever want to get into because of the horror stories I’ve read about kids dying from accidentally being left in hot cars. I might be more likely to make that mistake if leaving kids in the car has become “normal” for me.

    Post # 23
    Member
    1549 posts
    Bumble bee

    View original reply
    MelissainNC:  interesting! I just had a look and it seems to be illegal in all states and territories in Australia, with some states having the “reasonable” clause and I can see how that could be really subjective. 

    Post # 24
    Member
    861 posts
    Busy bee
    • Wedding: June 2012

    I think it depends on the culture. For example, where I live people very frequently leave kids in the car for short periods of time to run into stores. I do it myself when it’s for a quick minute and I can see the car. I lock the doors and use the remote starter if it’s cold so the heat runs. It seems like Americans are much less inclined to do this. 

    Post # 26
    Member
    9076 posts
    Buzzing Beekeeper
    • Wedding: December 2012

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    MelissainNC:  an opinion can’t be wrong. It’s an opinion. I’m one of those never okay people, and I’m alright with that. What I do with my kids is my business, and you’ll never see them in a car without an adult. 

    Post # 27
    Member
    1311 posts
    Bumble bee

    I guess it depends on age, temperament, maturity, responsibility, etc of the kids being left. Would I leave a baby? No. Would I leave a well-behaved 8 year old? Sure.

    My mom used to do this all the time with me and my sister if she just needed to run in and get a few things. Of course the doors were locked, windows cracked, she took the keys, etc. and my sister and I were very well behaved.

    Parents these days are so shoved up their kids’ butts that this seems like OMG THE WORST THING EVER. 

    Post # 28
    Member
    893 posts
    Busy bee
    • Wedding: July 2011

    Apparently parents in Denmark leave their babies in strollers on the sidewalk while they eat at restaurants and shop.  Even when it’s freezing cold.  THAT seems extreme to me!!

    Post # 29
    Member
    1739 posts
    Bumble bee
    • Wedding: June 2016

    View original reply
    ABL12490:  “Parents these days are so shoved up their kids’ butts that this seems like OMG THE WORST THING EVER.”

    TRUTH!  And they are not doing their kids any favors!  Just wait until their kids are in their 20s and can’t figure out how to be independent, or are too scared to take any risks.  It’s just sad.  I have students (college) who still have parents dictating what they do, and bailing them out at every turn.    Good grief.  

    Everyone should read this website:  http://www.freerangekids.com/ and commit it to memory.  Unfortunately, the people who need to most are already predisposed to not understand why it’s so important.  

     

    Post # 30
    Member
    186 posts
    Blushing bee
    • Wedding: October 2017 - Brakefield at River Walk

    I have to say, I didn’t read the other comments, but I am a parent to the most amazing 2 year old boy that I have ever laid eyes on and there is absolutely no way I would leave him in the car, even if I did just have to grab one thing. I have left him in the car to run back into the house to grab something, but I watch him through the window. I’ve read way too many stories about people leaving babies in cars and the cars end up stolen, or the baby gets kidnapped, or they die from the heat. He is only 2, but he knows how to unbuckle his car seat by himself, so that alone would scare me if he was left alone, even for a few seconds. I am in Rock Hill, SC and I’ve actually been told by several cops that it is illegal to leave little kids in the car even if it was just to quickly grab something. I couldn’t do it. I worked hard for his life and I’m definitley not going to risk it. He can go with me, I have no problems with that.

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