(Closed) Is it overkill to remind people the RSVP deadline is coming up?

posted 8 years ago in Etiquette
Post # 3
Member
558 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: June 2011

give them until the deadline.

Post # 4
Member
4520 posts
Honey bee
  • Wedding: September 2010

I would wait till after the deadline, I think. I might be slightly annoyed as a guest to get a reminder before the deadline had arrived. 

Post # 5
Member
1962 posts
Buzzing bee

Wait.  And the day after, send the email.  Three days won’t kill you.  Or will it 🙂

Post # 6
Member
1432 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: November 2013

In My Humble Opinion, I’d wait for the deadline to pass.  It sounds as if you’ll have to contact people anyway with a reminder, so you might as well wait until the official RSVP date has passed.  Even if it’s the day after.

Like stillme, I’d probably be annoyed if I got a reminder prior to the deadline.  

Post # 7
Member
647 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: June 2011

I’d be annoyed if I got a “reminder e-mail”.  I think you gave them until a date to respond, you have to honor that.  A lot of people look at the RSVP date as the date they drop it into the mail.

Post # 8
Member
521 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: December 1969

I kindof impartial to this. My fi’s uncle sent us a little facebook message reminding us of the upcoming deadline and we found out that he never recieved our RSVP even though we sent it a month prior. I wasn’t annoyed; I would have just ignored it if it didn’t apply to me (because it was prolly a mass message)

My Future Sister-In-Law has been putting up facebook status updates…though I think that is a little bit more annoying because if I was a friend not invited to her wedding, I would be kind of annoyed.

 

Post # 9
Member
837 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: October 2010

wait until after the deadline – calling ahead will annoy your guests.  You’ll probably end up getting a bunch the few days after the deadline because people seem think the rsvp deadline is when to put it in the mail.. annoying but true lol

Post # 11
Member
10367 posts
Sugar Beekeeper
  • Wedding: September 2010

If they haven’t sent it now, it won’t get to you before the deadline. Just wait two days. Then you can send the email, get the same answer at the same time you would have gotten it anyways, and nobody will be annoyed at you 🙂

Post # 12
Member
1120 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: July 2009

I would wait until after the deadline – as a guest, I would be a little annoyed to get a message like that.

Post # 13
Member
250 posts
Helper bee

I actually sent a reminder email to members of my family that I knew weren’t going to respond.  I ended up getting one response from that.  No one else bothered. 

Oh and I should add that I sent the reminders the day before the RSVPs were due and that was only because I was in all day meetings the following 2 days and I didn’t want to forget. 

Post # 14
Member
2532 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: August 2010

I would say give them until at least the deadline. We didnt start calling or emailing anyone until about a week or two after our deadline. Thats because our deadline was 5 weeks before our wedding date so about 3 weeks beforehand we started asking. Honestly we didnt have a final count until about 3 days beforehand because some people at the last minute decided to bring a date or were not able to come. You still have 5 weeks as well so I would just give them more time!

Post # 15
Member
160 posts
Blushing bee
  • Wedding: October 2010

I know what you mean – my deadline is Sept. 1, which is like….now.  I’m dying to light a fire under the stragglers, but Fiance is keeping me in check.  She says it is rude to call people before the deadline, and I think she is right.

Post # 16
Member
621 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: October 2010

our deadline was aug 15th and only today did i get a complete list! This is too much stress! I feel like i was begging for people to respond. i put the stamp on the response card, so why not just mark it and drop it in the mail!

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