(Closed) is it possible for asians to have assigned seating?

posted 9 years ago in South East Asian
Post # 3
752 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: August 2010 - Ocean View Villas/Jasmine Seafood Restaurant

I’m very curious about this too. I’m wondering if there are any couples who have tried to have a seating chart with a large reception. Especially with Asian American weddings, will they even follow escort cards or seating charts?

 Our wedding guestlist is around 500 right now. My mom says she wants a seating chart. I’m not sure the work is worth it.

Post # 4
521 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: December 1969

I was at a wedding where the bride was of Asian descendent and the groom was of Hispanic descendent. They had about 250-300 people there without a seating chart and oh man, it was a mess. The bride’s family decided one side of the venue was theirs and pushed together circle tables to sit like 30 of her family members so than the groom’s side decided the other side was theirs and kind of did the same thing except were more sorted by parents and grandparents, kids, young adults, and than just an assortment of people. The co-workers and other friends of the family were all sorted out by section in the middle areas with table splitting themselves up and there were tables just filled with one or two people who didn’t know everyone else and were too shy to speak with the big noisy crowds of families. The bride ended up spending most of her time at her family big table and his side of the family rarely saw her for congratulations and the groom was then forced to entertain the rest of the venue because of the family split.

 I think a wedding should be a uniting of the families and I am from a southern white family and my fiance is Puerto Rican. I am planning on doing a seating chart just because I don’t want it turned into my family vs his family and than our college friends in the middle. I’m grouping by age and personalities in mind, but I still want to intertwine the two families. Of course, I’m not going to sit my grandma in law who only speaks Spanish without people who can understand her, but I still don’t want to do bride side than groom side. 

I totally believed that people are like sheep and need to be led. A seating chart just reduces the chances of it becoming one side this and one side that, I believe. You can have ushers and helpers to seat people to reduce the amount of people that doesn’t follow the seating chart. Or you can just assign numbers to the people and they still have the choice of where to sit at their table. Of course, there will always be the oddballs who switch with so and so to sit next to their grandma or something…

Well, just my two cents…

Post # 5
1573 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: August 2009

I am doing both..a seating chart and place cards at each table


I have two sets of divorced parents (ours) who will not be seated together and an aunt who is not liked by some family, so we really have to have asigned seating


plus I think it is better so peoepl will be seated near friends and family they are already familiar with and feel more comfortable


I only have 61 people so not too hard

Post # 6
685 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: June 2010

I was at a recent function attended predominately by Asian (I’m Filipino, btw).  There was no seating plan whatsoever and omg, the madness!!!  Pretty soon there were tables with 12 chairs and some tables with fewer than 6. 

We’re definitely having a seating plan and place cards to ensure this doesn’t happen.

Post # 7
7173 posts
Busy Beekeeper

How are you doing dinner?  Buffet or plated?  If plated, do the seating chart.

Are you planning to give instructions on open seating?  It can be confusing to people if they aren’t sure where to sit (especially the older guests).

I think it can be done and people will figure out where to sit – you will have the guests that are ‘stuck’, though.

I went to a 200-ish wedding with open seating.  There were several family tables that were reserved and everyone else found a place.   

Post # 8
28 posts
  • Wedding: June 2009

I would NOT reccomend a seating chart especially for a larger wedding (300+).  I went to a wedding where there was a seating chart and need I say it was ridiculous! We had to wait to be escorted to our table and with the tons of tables there, it was just a mad house! We all know that many people DO NOT RSVP! So some older individuals who were invited did not get to get seated til everyone was seated! Come on now, you know they wouldn’t be there unless they were invited! So I would just reserve tables for VIP people (i.e. family members, close friends who want to sit together) or just section off certain areas for certain groups of people.  For instance but older people towards the front of the reception (since they are the first to leave) and younger people towards the back or group coworkers together. etc.



Post # 9
853 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: September 2009

i’ve been to multiple asian wedding receptions that have quasi assigned seating – you’re assigned to a table but not a specific seat at the table. i’ve also heard of receptions where the venue is divided into sections so you’re seated in a section but within the section there are multiple tables to pick from so you have some flexibility of who you end up sitting with.

Post # 10
9 posts


  My cousin had his wedding last week and there was 500 people. He had about 10 table ushers to help people go to their seating, but for immediate family, he had reserved table seatings. I found that having ushers really help. I do find that its a lot harder to do assign seating with asian weddings since most just come in and really don’t pay attention to side tables. It was difficult just trying to get people to sign a guestbook, never mind seating charts.

Post # 11
6 posts
  • Wedding: May 2010

Hi Bees,

I’ve never been to an Asian wedding that was open seating!  They all would have assigned tables and chances are you’ve been placed at a certain table b/c you know others there.  Family members help serve as ushers and there are always a few people w/ the entire guest list standing near the tables that can help any guests that get lost.  Also, the room is sometimes divided in half – groom or bride side.

Post # 12
11 posts
  • Wedding: March 2012

No seating number in Asian culture.. lol  close family on both sides should seat close to the bride and groom table. 

Post # 12
210 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: December 2012

Every chinese wedding ive been to has planned table seating but not the individual seat with place holders etc, just “you’re at table 10” or whatever, and x2 vip tables for immediate family (but not the parents) plus the bride and grooms table where parents and grandparents sit also.

Post # 13
4040 posts
Honey bee

Regardless of cultures, I would never recommend mixing people up. It doesn’t make the sides get to know each other; instead the guests may feel isolated. I remember one cousin’s wedding we attended – long tables for 12 – which was possibly made up of 4 her relatives, 4 ours, and 4 friends. It was one of the longest nights of my life. The only others we knew, and therefore spent the most time talking to, was a cousin and his wife, who sat across from us. The alcoholic cousin, whose ability to BS knows no bounds, and thinks he’s a comedian. I.e I remember he used the word “orgasm” twice that night. Yep, not what I wanted to hear.  (BTW, I still communicate with his now ex-wife, but haven’t seen him in 15 years).

Post # 14
850 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: June 2014

cynderella:  I am (mostly) white, my husband is Filipino, and we had a seating chart at our wedding, but we had around 150 guests–very small for a Filipino wedding but our location was far for most of his relatives.

Another Filipino wedding I attended this summer had probably closer to 300 guests. She still had a seating chart. Everyone did abide by the seating chart since it was a plated meal. I think that’s the key–you can’t really have a plated meal without a seating chart, can you?

Post # 15
1329 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: October 2015

i’m asian and definitely having a seating chart. my guest list is around 130. 

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