Post # 1
So a friend of my recently told me that it is proper etiquette to invite my boss to the wedding. I have never heard of this rule. She tends to think the exact opposite of most people, but I was wondering what other bees think.
I don’t think my boss would come (even if he did, I wouldn’t mind–he’s a great guy), but I really didn’t plan on sending him an invite. By the time I get married, I will have been working for him for about 1 1/2 years. So I know him fairly well, but only in the context of work.
ETA: Should probably note that I was recently promoted to a higher position where I will now be working with him and the Senior Leadership team on a more frequent, closer basis (about 2-3 hours per week in meetings) and making major decisions for the company. So in essence, he is the Executive Director, but my work relationship/exposure to him has no increased in importance.
Post # 3
Are you inviting other co-workers to your wedding?
I’ve heard it’s proper to invite your boss/supervisor if you invite other coworkers.. otherwise it’s a nice gesture to invite him.
I do plan on inviting a few co-workers, and my boss & his wife. I’ve known him since I was 4 years old, and I’ve been working for him 11 years [13 years at the time of the wedding!].
Post # 4
I honestly do not know!!
But I did just find this article, it might be helpful….
Post # 5
I haven’t decided yet about other co-workers. I was thinking about inviting my program assistant. She works for me and we share an office together. I haven’t decided yet since she might be moving in the next few months out of the state and leaving the company.
Post # 6
My feelings are I work with them and if I didnt work there they wouldnt be invited so they would not be invited to my wedding. My job would be considered separate for my life and anyone there is not my family they are coworkers.
Post # 7
I’m not sure. Every case is different. I would definitely invite MY boss to my wedding, but its only because we’ve grown super close. She’s like an older friend and guide for me. Your relationship may be more on a professional level, in which case I would suggest keeping it that way, and not worrying about inviting the boss to the wedding.
Post # 8
I would invite my boss to my wedding, but only because we are super close. I consider her to be more of my older friend and guide, than my boss. Your relationship may be more on a professional level, in which case I would suggest not worrying about it.
Post # 9
Wow, 4 votes and it’s a 4 way tie….interesting. I am more confused now. 🙁
Post # 10
I plan on inviting my boss and more co workers than I had originally planned, but i think the choice depends on how you interact with them more than etiquette. I work closely with a large group of people in a laid back workplace, so for me, I am inviting the people I go out to lunch with, who ask me how my wedding dress search is going, who stay past hours to help me on a project – they are my work family. BUT I will also say that if your boss barely has the notion that your getting married, doesn’t seem remotly interested in your life, don’t invite him.
Post # 11
Didn’t vote because my choice
NO… NEVER a good idea.. wasn’t an option
Truthfully… it is not a good idea.
And always a great Question for the Etiquette Board…
And here is a link to a past topic where all that was discussed quite extensively.
Be sure and read the replies from aspasia475 (Reply # 6) and myself (Reply # 12)… both of us HUGE Etiquette Lovers / Followers that frequent this Board here on WBee. Our replies go into a bit about WHY it is important to keep your Career Life seperate from your Personal Life.
Hope this helps,
Post # 12
@This Time Round: Very helpful thread! Thank you. Given the advice, I think I will stick with just inviting my program assistant. We eat lunch together every day, occasionally hang out together on the weekends and I know her Boyfriend or Best Friend. I feel comfortable inviting her and would enjoy her company.
I really like my boss and he has offered his congratulations/a little interest in the wedding, but I value our professional relationship and want to keep it that way!
Post # 13
If you’re inviting your whole team, sure. But I think it would be weird to just invite the boss or just him and a couple others. Invite who you are actually close friends with!
Post # 14
@maya2008: I’ve never heard of this rule.
My fiance is not inviting his boss to the wedding, but I will be inviting mine. It should be noted, however, that I am close with my boss and several of my coworkers (who will also be invited).
I agree with previous posters who said that you should invite people you are close with.
Post # 15
We are hesitating… Fiance has 3 (!) bosses in his 30-ish people firm (!!).
One of his coworkers recently got married, and one boss showed up with two extra un-invited buddies to her destination wedding in St. Tomas. We don’t want that to happen! (Not that our wedding location is as appealing as a tropical island is).
But she did mention that she received some generous gifts from them all, which I guess at least makes up for just showing up with some extra pals on the beach.
I have two bosses, but one is the owner of the company and the other is my supervisor. I am debating on whether to invite them… I am not so keen on the owner of my company going (he’s OK, just loud), and if I invite my supervisor there are a couple other coworkers I’d have to invite in order to avoid hurt feelings (because he’s good friends with them and I work closely with them)
It’s a small wedding but we have a tiny bit of wiggle room in what I’m calling “luxury” or “nice to have but not required” guests, which would include people like co-workers, some more distant college friends and FI’s mom’s book group (haha).
Post # 16
If you are not super close with your boss then I do not see why you would.