(Closed) Is it REALLY different when it’s your own child?

posted 7 years ago in Babies
Post # 3
Member
3620 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: September 2010

Hahaha, I love this thread already and am curious to see what people post! I am NOT into kids lately. So many of them are brats lately and I just have zero patience! And then all the people I know that are planning to have babies soon, in my opinion, shouldn’t (for various reasons, including not being able to pay their mortgage, but thinking that it is a good idea to get a dog and have a child…). I dunno, maybe I’m cynical… but I do like my niece and nephew… and like them more cuz I can give them back to my brothers…

Post # 4
Member
685 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: February 2009

LOL YES IT IS!!!!!

 My point is I HATED babysitting! I couldnt really stand kids to be honest. I worked in retail so I didn’t have to babysit all through high school. Everyone thought I was going to be the last of everyone to have a baby and BOOM I was the FIRST! Total shocker to everyone including myself!

 I adore my son. Still not a fan of too many other kids though. Yesterday I saw our little girl on the ultrasound for the first time and fell in love. Still couldn’t care less about many other ultra sound photos. Kids are cute but I can only handle mine. Thats just the cold hard facts. But Yes it is different!!!!

Post # 5
Member
5823 posts
Bee Keeper

Yes.

Ahem, let me say that again.

YES.

Everything is different when it’s YOUR baby.  I can’t explain why, maybe because it’s traced back as a reflection of yourself and all people have some secret vanity associated with showing off “their” babies, but YES it’s completely different.  You love your baby even when they are ugly.  You love them even when they misbehave.  Sure, they piss you off sometimes.  And embarass you.  And pee on you.  But somehow you still love them.  Because they are YOURS.  Oh, and because dumping them on someone else isn’t an option anymore.

(There is some humor in my reply above, please take it as lighthearted, as is intentioned…)

Post # 6
Member
543 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: November 2010

Yes it reallly is different when its your own! I was the sameee way… didnt like babysitting or wasnt interested in anyone elses kids really. Example, when my nephew was little and would be drooling everywhere she would just wipe it all with her hand. I would CRINGE. literally. I wouldnt even drink after him because I didnt want baby back wash. And her reply was always “When it’s your kid you won’t mind”. Now that i’ve had my daughter.. I really dont mind. I’ll wipe her drool/dirty mouth/snotty nose with my hand if i need to! It’s just different. I had ZERO patience before having a child… then BAM now i have it(most of the time). You’ll see one day! It’s because you love your child.. you dont love all those other snot nose babies 🙂

Post # 7
Member
7053 posts
Busy Beekeeper
  • Wedding: July 2010

I used to be the one who complained about babies crying in restaurants.  I’d be like “ugh.  why did they bring a baby out to dinner?”

Now?  I just smile and say (and mean it) “aw…poor little thing.  But he/she’s so cute.”

It is true.  You do feel differently when you’re a mom.

Post # 8
Member
1130 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: October 2010

I am very interested in this thread, because I am experiencing some doubts too. I know I want kids. I would like to have them tomorrow if I could (husband wants to wait a year). However, I was at the library today and children were running around screaming and I couldn’t get out of there fast enough. The same thing happens when I go the mall and pass the indoor jungle gym.

 Do you also build a better tolerance to other people’s screaming, whining kids, once you have your own?

Post # 9
Member
3004 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: March 2010

I’m interested too. I don’t have my own children but I think that when they are your own it’s different. When you are babysitting they aren’t your kids so it’s harder to get them to obey, or they don’t do the stuff you would approve of, etc.

Post # 10
Member
504 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: April 2011

After 3 boys I have to say YES. I’m the oldest so I had to babysit my younger siblings and they were always more of a burden than anything. I had little cousins that I would play with but for the most part I didn’t want to be bothered. My family is still a bit surprised that I have 3 kids and am wanting another one because I have 0 patience period. I really do love being a mom and I couldn’t imagine my life without either one of them.

Once you look into their little eyes and see resemblences of you and your SO it just makes all the difference in the world. All those annoying things you see other people’s children doing are now the cutest things in the world and you can’t wait to take videos and pictures to show the family.

Post # 11
Member
1872 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: February 2011

This is good to hear! When I watch my friends with their kids, I just get tired and freaked out at the thought of having to do it someday myself.

Post # 12
Member
1570 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: March 1996

This is what I’m counting on, glad to hear it’s true!

Post # 13
Member
447 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: July 2009

I have more tolerance for children now, but it still only goes so far. I can have sympathy for the babies who won’t stop crying, because I’ve been there, but I have no patience for those children who are old enough to know better but throw a tantrum anyway.

Before, I couldn’t stand children at all. I felt awkward around them and never knew how to respond when they tried to ask me questions. I hated sticky fingers. I helped babysit once, and it wasn’t too bad, but I was in charge of the older kids.

I actually wasn’t even sure that I wanted children. Yes, I had names picked out and what not, but I had absolutely no maternal instinct at all. I only had baby fever when both of my best friends were pregnant, and I wasn’t. After I got my senses back, I was over it.

As far as anything you have to do goes, it is easier. I remember my friend basically thrusting her kid (6 weeks old) in my arms when I was six months pregnant, and I had no idea what to do with him. I still wouldn’t have any idea.

I have no issue handling my daughter. I hate the drool though. I can change a diaper most of the time without a problem, but drool, ew, I hate the feel of it on my fingers. My daughter’s was the first diaper I ever changed.

I really can only handle my daughter though. I don’t go crazy for babies or anything. Nothing has changed there.

Post # 14
Member
5823 posts
Bee Keeper

I definitely have more tolerance for babies and children.  I just consider it kharma.  Because someday MY kids will embarass me by throwing a tantrum, and that shouldn’t reflect on ME but people always blame parents even when the kids are just psychopathic twerps like my cousin.  So, yeah.  I see other babies/kids now and I smile when they mess up or scream or whatever.  And I think “Thank God that’s not me today.”

Post # 15
Member
990 posts
Busy bee

I was that way before I got preggers. I was scared that I didnt really want kids because kids never really took to me and I would get kind of annoyed when they would walk or talk! But not that I am preggers, I am SO EXCITED for all of the stages and changes!

Post # 16
Member
447 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: July 2009

Can I state that I can’t stand the children who should know better, not the parents? Sometimes I see those parents who are disciplining their children, but the children won’t listen. That’s the fault of the child. There’s a difference between that and those parents who do nothing and let their child scream.

And just so you know, I was not offended MightySapphire, I just wanted to clarify. I realized when I read your comment that people might have taken what I said the wrong way.

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