(Closed) Is it rude for ppl 2 leave b4 B&G’s grand exit? H

posted 9 years ago in Reception
Post # 3
Member
329 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: July 2009

Maybe I’m wrong, but I thought the only rule about leaving was that no guests should leave before the cake cutting. Most weddings I’ve been to haven’t even have a "grand exit"…I’m not sure people will be waiting for it.

Post # 4
Member
270 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: April 2013

I really think it depends on your cultural background. I know that in my culture, there isn’t even such a thing as a "grand exit". The bride and groom and their parents are the hosts of the party and therefore should be the last to leave after bidding their guests good-bye – that’s the way I was brought up and that’s the way all the weddings i’ve been to have progressed. I do know that in the US it’s customary for the B&G to have a grand exit and, unless there will be many little ones, I don’t see why your guests would need to leave before 10:45. I think you’re okay(but then I also wouldn’t be offended if people left early).

Post # 5
Member
2856 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: September 2009

I think it all depends on the family as well as your cultural background as well. I personally do not think it is rude to leave prior to the B & G’s grand exit if there even is one. There were no grand exits for the weddings I have attended.

What I did think was rude or strange was at my Boyfriend or Best Friend wedding, 80% of her guests left around 10:30 PM and the wedding was scheduled until 11:30 PM. The bride was a little disappointed but it didn’t ruin the day because then she got to spend more time with the remaining guests.

Post # 6
Bee
1048 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: September 2009 - City Hall

I don’t think it’s rude. I’ve been to several weddings where I left before the bride & groom – i had to. For one, I was moving across the country the very next day. I literally had to go home and pack up the dress I was wearing. lol. Another, I had traveled 3 hours by car to be there, and needed to drive home that same evening. And for Mrs. and Mr. Cherry Pie’s wedding, I left at like 10 pm. Mr. MJ and I, and one of the groomsmen who didn’t feel well (along with his FI), were the only people who left on that first school-bus shuttle. I felt bad but we did have to drive 22 hours home the next day, so we really needed to turn in.

In any circumstance where I need to leave early, I let the bride and groom know before the wedding day and give them an honest and reasonable reason why I won’t be staying. They’ve always been understanding.

Post # 7
Member
256 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: April 2009

Is it just me that noticed you are cutting the cake before dinner or the first dance?  I am thinking that might be a typo; I have never seen that order before.  Oh, I don’t think it is too late for you to leave then!

Post # 8
Member
672 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: November 2009

I don’t think it’s rude either.  I’m no expert – never been to a wedding with a grand exit – but it seems a little silly to me that it’d be considered rude for a guest to leave.

Post # 9
Member
256 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: April 2009

Sorry that didn’t make sense – I don’t think it is rude for guests to leave before your grand exit.  We are not having an exit, but really, guests should be allowed to leave when they choose.

Post # 10
Bee
1048 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: September 2009 - City Hall

@flbeachbride – one of my friends did it in that order; they figured it’d be best to do it while everyone was first sat down, enjoying their cocktails — before the mingling and partying began.

Post # 13
Member
256 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: April 2009

Thanks Miss Maryjane! It’s is interesting how different cultures/regions have so many different customs, like my FI’s family had never heard of doign a toast or prayer before dinner, and I have never been to a wedding that didn’t have a prayer before dinner.  It is extremely interesting to see all of these in practice.  Does the whole cake get cut then though, or is the rest saved until later?  I would think it would wait since the cake slices may not be as moist as when they are freshly cut; however, I have never refused cake before dinner.

Post # 14
Member
371 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: October 2009

I’ve never heard of it being rude to leave before a grand exit, only before cake cutting….But, I’ve never been to a wedding where they did a grand exit.

Post # 15
Member
405 posts
Helper bee

Uh oh – by most standards Fiance and I are rude. I’ve only been to a couple weddings but we’ve always (except for FI’s sisters wedding but that’s different) left before the grand exit. I don’t think it’s rude at all, if someone has to leave for whatever reason they shouldn’t feel bad for leaving. Just my opinion though. 🙂

Post # 16
Member
98 posts
Worker bee
  • Wedding: November 2009

I’m with several other posters, I thought it was rude to leave only before the cake cutting. What if you have older relatives who can’t or don’t want to stay all night, or people with younger children?

I think you’re fine on the etiquette in this case. Good luck!

  

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