Post # 1
I am trying to keep this whole wedding as simple as possible adn I really do not want to register. We bought a house in January and have all the basic necessities there, I just don’t feel that we need more pots and pans. That being said, if you don’t register do people not get you gifts or just give you card/check? Not sure if this would be rude. Anyone else not register?
Post # 3
It’s not rude to not register but I wouldn’t expect all checks or cash. People who want to give a gift will whether you register or not so you don’t have to register but when you start getting engraved frames and ugly platters, don’t be angry. What about a honeymoon registry?
Post # 4
I agree, many people will probably ask what you want or need or what your style is. Those that don’t ask will just guess!
It is not rude at all to NOT register but you should just be prepared to have some unexpected/unwanted gifts.
Post # 5
That’s something that we’ve thought about, but I wasn’t sure how it worked since it has to be paid off like 1.5 months before the wedding (thru Sandals.) I figured most people wouldn’t purchase their gifts until right before the wedding.
Post # 6
We didn’t register for the exact same reasons.
Got 90% checks and cash. Also got an ugly candle holder, some impractical and not-our-style service pieces, and an electronic fondue pot.
Good thing stores have liberal return policies!
Plus, 90% cash and checks is much better than 100% stuff we don’t want or need.
-Sidenote: I didn’t have a shower. I think this makes a difference. It is difficult to invite someone to a function where one of the main events is opening presents if you don’t give them some direction on what to buy.
Post # 7
Oh wedding gifts will usually be cash/checks in my world. People register around me for engagement parties and showers but only give money for wedding gifts. I don’t know what the norm is for Kansas City.
Post # 8
while i don’t think it’s rude, your older guests might. but i definitely wouldn’t expect all gift cards or cash…you’ll probably end up with a few toasters and random things you can’t return because you don’t know where they came from.
since you just bought a house, set up a registry at home depot or lowe’s. is there anything you want to upgrade? i know you want to keep things simple, but i’m a registry advocate 🙂 i just wouldn’t want to end up with a bunch of crap i don’t want but can’t return.
Post # 9
@CanAmBride: I don’t plan to have a shower either, not sure if anyone is planning to throw one, but we are on a very strict budget. And I agree 90% cash is better than a bunch of things we don’t really need/want! I guess I will just skip registering and see what we get, I just didn’t want to come off rude or mercenary.
Post # 10
@morgobride: It’s not really rude, but you’ll get a lot of gifts that you may not want. Also, it’s a little less convenient for your guests (they have to actually shop rather than looking at a list) and for you (people will bring the gift rather than going to your registery and having it mailed, also you’ll have to return to many different stores rather than just a couple).
Post # 11
@morgobride: I am by no means an expert but I believe with the honeymoon registry, you basically just get the cash. So people would feel like they are getting you something specific (i.e. a massage or candlelit dinner on the beach) but you’re really just getting money. This could be helpful in avoiding people who don’t want to just give money so they buy a gift you don’t really want…
Also, maybe consider registering for things that are not the basic necessities. Do you need new color coordinated bathroom stuff? A new bed set? Want a margarita maker but don’t want to spend the money on it? 🙂 A registry with some fun stuff is always a possibility. Heck, I think you can even just do it online.
Post # 12
We registered for 1 gift – a set of luggage. That was taken care of by my Maid/Matron of Honor, sister, and close family friend (they went in together). Other than that my Maid/Matron of Honor and our family friend spread the word that we don’t really need anything. Cash would be appreciated. We have had no one get upset by this. We had a couple of actual gifts but these were from people who know us very well and the gifts were great! I do not believe asking for cash is bad at all. I think it is all in the way it is relayed to your guests.