(Closed) Is it rude to ask a friend to help with day of coordination?

posted 8 years ago in Etiquette
Post # 3
Member
636 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: June 2009

I don’t think it would be rude if he has expressed interest in helping.  Just make sure to tell him if he isn’t interested it is no problem.  He’d probably be happy to help you – I wouldn’t use the word coordinator though.  It sounds like what you want him to do is pretty minimal so I’d just specifically ask if he would like to do those things.

Post # 4
Member
459 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: October 2010

I would think that it would largely depend on the type of person he is, as well as y’all’s friendship.  I personally love planning events, and wedding planning is awesome.  So if a good friend asked me to be there and help and all, I’d be thrilled!

Post # 5
Member
1872 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: February 2011

I don’t think it’s rude to ask; just rude to expect. And give him an “out” as well so he can decline–it’s hard to say no to a bride without an out!

Post # 6
Member
553 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: July 2011

I agree with Marzipan – as long as you let him know that you don’t mind if he declines, I say go for it.

I personally would not feel weird being asked to do this for a friend. I would feel honored to help as Southerntulip said. I would just lay it out they way you said it above – no pressure.

Post # 7
Member
93 posts
Worker bee
  • Wedding: December 2010

I think people get offended when they probably should have been a bridesmaid (or at least thought they should have been one!) and instead they get the grunt work. I think if you tell him how wonderful you think he would be with the job and that there is no one else you would trust more AND you express that you are worried it will interfere with his enjoyment of the party you not only flatter him but give him an out if he isnt comfortable performing the duties. I think it is great that you plan to include him in the rehearsal dinner and express your appreciation with a gift. I say go for it!

Post # 8
Member
2781 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: July 2010

I had a friend be the coordinator for my wedding, I asked and she accepted. I agree with PP’s that so long as you give them an out then it’s fine. 

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